Page 10 of Beware A Wallflower's Wrath
Again, he shook his head.
“Then why in heaven’s name are ye here now?” She crossed her plump arms and frowned at him.
“My wife died last year. I learned Annis was widowed and had a bookshop. I?—”
“Thought ye’d see what she was up to since ye’re a bachelor again?”
“It sounds terrible when you put it like that.”
“Ye’re terrible, ye foppish numptie,” she scoffed.
He was taken aback. Numptie? Did it mean a fool? He agreed. Foppish? Never. “If she turns me away, I will abide by her decision. But I am desperate to know how she fares.”
His expression must have been pathetic for her glare softened. He pushed his advantage as he had in court so many times before. “Mrs. Douglas, I was a young man influenced heavily by a domineering father. I am now a man who makes my own decisions and follows his own path. That path has led me back here. I must either atone for my dreadful mistake or spend the rest of my life in the attempt.”
“Hmph!” But her arms were not so tightly held across her chest. “She loved ye something fierce.”
Ignoring his pride, he sank to one knee and took the woman’s hand in his. “Please, Mrs. Douglas, Annis has never left my heart. I beg you… just five minutes with her to state my case and see she is well.”
“It’s no’ me ye should be on yer knees to.” She slapped her forehead with her hand and rolled her eyes to the ceiling. “Aye, right! Ye’ve been down this road before, eh?”
With a wave of her plump free hand, she bid him stand. He did and began to wipe a speck from his trouser leg when that word echoed in his brain. Foppish.
“I shouldna tell ye this, but she’s still upstairs. And if there’s any mischief, I’ll send for Colin.” She stood and poked a finger at his chest. “And he willna leave much to send back to England.”
Relieved, heart thumping, Robert picked up his abused hat and followed the prickly woman to the back of the shop and up a flight of stairs.
CHAPTER 4
“I’m sorry if I’m putting you behind,” murmured Rose as Annis poured tea. “But I needed to speak to you before you left.”
“Och, no matter. My packing was done yesterday, and Aileen is minding the store already.” She added an extra lump of sugar to Rose’s tea. The poor lass seemed to need a bit of sweetening today. “What’s on yer mind? Is Colin hounding ye again?”
Rose’s dark eyes glimmered as she shook her head. “He’s been so patient and considerate. The man is a saint.”
Annis snorted. “That’s the last word our family would use to describe Colin. But he does love ye, Rose.”
“I know. And I love him more than… I love him so much I cannot bear to have him suffer. And I know he will if he marries me.”
Annis lifted her brows in surprise. “Ye dinna seem like the hurtful sort to me. How could ye possibly hurt the mon by loving him?”
The long sigh tore at Annis’s heart. She cared for both of them. Her friend was deeply troubled, and she hoped she could help.
“I cannot have children. Colin insists he does not care.” Rose blinked back tears. “He would make a wonderful father. And he deserves someone who can give back to him what he lost.”
Annis reached out to hold Rose’s hand, blinking back her own tears. “Oh, you poor thing. No one can replace his wife and son. They hold a corner of his heart, but he’s a mon who looks to the future. And ye’re his future.” So, this was why they were not yet wed. “Why do ye believe yerself barren?”
“I had smallpox as a child. The physician told my mother that, with the high fever, the disease could make a woman infertile. I’ve never had more than several menses a year. My mother said with so few, it would be unlikely I would become pregnant.”
“So ye dinna ken for sure?”
“No, but I cannot give Colin false hope. What if he regrets our union? What if he’s blinded by love and realizes after we’re married how he longs for a family?” A sob filled the silence. “How can I ask him to give that up?”
Annis understood Rose’s hesitation. Not being able to produce children was a humiliation for a woman, a sign that she had some fault within her or was not blessed by God. Yet she knew her cousin well, had helped him through his terrible time of loss.
“Rose, when Colin lost his family, he wanted to die with them. The grief, the pain was long-lived and horrible. He told me once he could never go through it again. Perhaps…” She paused, tucking a strand of the crying woman’s ebony hair behind her ear, then tipping her chin to make eye contact. “Perhaps Colin fears losing ye in the birthing bed. His love for ye runs so deep, and he’s a stubborn, loyal mon who doesna give up once his mind is set. If he says he doesna care about more children of his own, he means it.”
She saw the hope glimmer in Rose’s eyes. “Fenella said much the same thing, but I was afraid it was only to make me feel better. Lachlan told her Colin never speaks without thinking through his words.”
