Page 41 of An Allusive Love
“Dinna tell her, but I’ll miss Lissie poking around.” Enid smiled and sniffed again. “She’s a help to me, and I’ve become a wee spoiled.”
Brodie took Kirstine’s hand and led her from the kitchen. They made their way outside to the back of the castle. They ambled through the herb garden and turned toward the courtyard. He laced his fingers through hers and sucked in a deep breath of the night air. She wanted to hold him and absorb his pain. Instead, she would be his rock, support him in any way she could. Be strong for him when he faltered with the anguish of losing a brother.
Just before they reached the courtyard, he stopped in the shadows and pulled her close. “I’ll need to lean on ye to get through this, Kirsty.”
His breath ruffled her hair, and she tightened her arms around his waist. She could feel the soft beat of his heart against her cheek. Reaching up, she cupped his face. “I’m here for ye, Brodie. As I always am.”
He enfolded her wrists, turned over her hands, and placed a kiss on each palm. Then his lips lingered against hers. A soft, sad, gentle kiss that twisted her heart. “I was the most fortunate of men when I left ye earlier today. How quickly life can change.”
She nodded, breathing in his familiar musky scent. How could a day begin with so much hope and end in such misery?
“Did ye tell yer folks about our betrothal?”
She nodded again, chewing on her bottom lip. Regret clouded his blue eyes.
“I didna have time, I’m afraid,” he said, his voice hoarse.
“It can wait, Brodie. Now is no’ the time to share such joyful news.”
He sighed and gave her an apologetic smile, wrapping her close and sinking his face in her hair. “We’ll make the announcement in a week or two. When we both decide the time is right. I’m sorry, Kirsty. For the love of saints, I wish—”
“Shhh,” she soothed when his voice broke. “I’m here, we’re together. We canna ask for more now. Let’s be thankful we have each other.”
“Ye’re right. We need to count our blessings in times like these.” He stepped back and laced his fingers through hers, leading her back to the path. “Ye’re sure Grandda will recover?”
“Ma thinks he gave his heart a scare, but it wasna a terrible spasm for the pain stayed in his chest. He has a strong beat again and his color is back.” Kirstin grimaced. “When James Weir died last year, she remembers his pain spread through his arm. He was weak and barely conscious. She said the foxglove helped for a while. When she listened to Calum’s chest, he had a strong beat again and didn’t need the tincture. He’s a resilient mon.”
“He’s a stubborn mon,” chuckled Brodie.
“I’d be surprised if he was still in bed tomorrow, regardless of what my mother or Peigi orders. We’ll have to keep an eye on him. He’ll tire more easily for a spell.”
Wagon wheels crunched on the courtyard stones. Women’s voices floated from the receiving hall, and they could hear Mrs. MacDunn and Glynnis discussing the laudanum. Kirstine wished she could stay but tamped down her anxiety.
“I’ll be fine, love,” he whispered in her ear as if reading her mind, “but promise ye’ll be back tomorrow.”
“Nothing could keep me away.”
Her father tied his horse to the back of the wagon and helped both women onto the bench. They waved goodbye and rode in silence until they were out of sight of the castle. The tears threatened now that she had a respite from her obligations. Kirstine laid her head on her mother’s shoulder. Her eyes began to droop when she remembered.
“Och, did ye mention the betrothal to anyone?” she asked.
They both shook their heads. “Of course no’,” her mother said. “It would be improper. Why?”
“Brodie had no time to tell his family before they received the news about Ian.” She blinked, her eyes burning again. “We canna announce it now.”
“What matters is that he asked, and he loves ye. It’s all I ever wanted for ye, Kirsty.” Her mother patted Kirstine’s cheek. “A few weeks are a wee inconvenience for a lifetime of happiness. It’s but a storm cloud that will hover and dissipate.”
She nodded as tears streaked down her cheek. And then she was wrapped in a maternal hug, rocked and soothed as she had for Brodie.
“Love and loss have equal parts in the cycle. We learn to embrace one and accept the other. Without the loss, ye dinna appreciate the life.”
With a sob, Kirstine let her anguish soak her mother’s chest.
“There, there, my sweet lass. It’s been a long night, and ye can let it out now. Unburden yerself so ye’ll have the strength to do it again tomorrow.” She kissed the top of her daughter’s head and brushed back the wet strands clinging to her face. “Yer grandmother always said tears cleansed us and helped us to heal what ailed us on the inside.”
If that were true, Kirstine thought, they’d need to fill a loch to rinse away the pain and sorrow of the days to come.
*
