Page 20 of Forever to Fall
Adjusting his glasses with his thumb, Beckett made a decision. Yes, he wanted to see Mallory and get back to how they used to be. But he also wasn’t a bully, and he’d wait for her to come to him. “You know,” he said, clearing past the lump in his throat. “I should probably head back to my place. You guys have some family stuff and...” he trailed off, unable to think of a reasonable lie for why he was leaving dinner before they even sat down.
“What are you talking about?” Evan asked, closing the distance between them and hoisting and now-sleeping Tyson into his arms.
Slightly panicked, Beckett fidgeted with his hands until he got Tyson into place. The kid was as hefty as a sack of sand, and his shoulders slumped from the weight of him. “What are you feeding this kid, Emily?” he teased, watching her eyes shine with pride.
“Nothing that isn’t doctor approved. I’m still trying to breastfeed every—”
“Nope!” Evan yelped, raising his hands in defense. “Em, you know the rules. I want to know everything about my family, especially my niece and nephews, but I draw the line at body talk. I know you had to have sex once to make Tyson, and that is as far as I’m willing to go on the topic. Now please talk about anything else in the world.”
Emily threw her head back and groaned. “You are such a baby, Ev.” Reaching out, she pinched his elbow until he wiggled free. It was a patented Lawson family defense strategy, and Beckett learned it at an early age.
“I’m not a baby, I just don’t want to know anything about my sisters’ personal lives.”
“I doubt you’re this squeamish with Mal,” Emily countered, eyebrow raised. “And if you’re going to be ridiculous, I’m going to make you go outside so we can start over.”
Evan’s lips quirked at her threat.
Evan and Mallory were only eighteen months apart and were practically inseparable as kids, and still were as far as Beckett could tell. While he doubted the pair talked about hormones and their dating exploits, he assumed Evan and Mallory talked about almost every aspect of their lives. Well, except for one very big aspect. Beckett and Evan were thick as thieves, but if Evan knew he’d broken his sister’s heart, Beckett would be six feet under.
As if summoning her into the room, Mallory appeared in the hallway. Her hair was styled up and off her face, with tendrils of curls spilling over her shoulders. Even from a distance, Beckett saw a rosy hue to her cheeks and a swipe of deep pink across her lips. He wanted to stride over to her, take her in his arms and kiss that lipstick away.
Instead, since he was in the land of the living, he rearranged the baby and hoped she couldn’t see his pulse hammering in his neck. “Hey, Mal.” Beckett lamely lifted a hand in greeting, the other arm still nestling Tyson to his chest.
“Hi,” Mallory replied, her greeting swallowed up by Evan and Emily’s bickering. Her blue eyes darkened at the sight of him, and he hoped he wasn’t making her uncomfortable by showing up at her place. If she was angry with him, she covered it well. “I see you’ve met Tyson,” she added, stepping closer until she could reach her nephew. Raising a hand, she gently swiped his fuzzy hair off his forehead. Never one to be jealous of a baby, Beckett suddenly wished she’d do that to him.
But, then again, he was currently holding a baby and thought spontaneous combustion was a bad idea. “Yeah,” he choked, clearing past a lump in his throat. He’d seen Mallory a handful of times since coming back to town, but tonight felt different. Maybe it was because he was in her space, maybe it was the baby powder scent of Tyson between them paired with her loving expression, but Beckett had to focus on breathing.
“Please tell me these two haven’t started a nuclear war out here.” She pitched her head toward her siblings and sighed good-naturedly. “They’ll be the death of us all.”
For a moment, they stared at each other. Beckett studied her expression like he was practicing for an exam, memorizing every feature and detail for later. Her hair looked so soft; his fingers twitched to feel the strands between his fingers. He had first-hand knowledge of how silky her hair was, and if he wasn’t careful, he was about to show how much that memory affected him.
After he cleared his throat again, Emily heard and misunderstood the situation. “Goodness,” she said as she walked to the table. Grabbing one of the glasses, she gave it to Mallory before scooping up Tyson. “That’s for you, Beckett. Where are my manners?”
Becket felt the absence of little Tyson immediately, and apparently so did Mallory. Without a human shield between them, she backed away until her butt hit the wall. He stepped closer, not wanting to lose what little closeness they still shared. “Here.” Mallory thrust the glass into his hands before falling back against the wall. She opened her mouth to say something else, but the kitchen timer dinged and she sprinted to freedom.
Dinner was delicious, and the conversation flowed well. Mallory sat in the corner, her back ramrod straight and her gaze always directed beyond Beckett’s shoulder. He started to fear he was Medusa and would turn Mallory to stone if their eyes locked. Frankly, he’d chance turning to marble if he had just one minute of the old Mallory.
“Thanks for dinner, ladies,” Evan said when the last of the meal was devoured. “Take this as high praise when I say it was delicious.”
“Given who your fiancée is, I’ll take it.”
Beckett wasn’t sure who knew of Evan’s intentions with CeCe, but judging from Emily’s expression, the cat was out of the bag. “Oh, my God, Ev!” She squealed and startled Tyson awake. His little arms flailed at his sides; his back arched in protest. Emily covered his head and cooed for a moment before continuing, “You popped the question to CeCe?”
Evan shook his head and gave Mallory a death glare. “Not yet.” His words were clipped and very un-Evan-like. “I told Mal last week that I was planning on it, because I needed Nana Lawson’s ring.”
For a moment, the table went silent. Mallory’s already downturned gaze was even more shadowed, and he didn’t miss how her fingers toyed with the edge of the table cloth. Her knuckles were whiter than their empty dinner plates, her fingers curled tightly around each other.
Emily looked at Mallory, hesitating a moment before she congratulated her brother. “I know you two will be very happy together. I’m excited for you, Ev.” With her free hand, she reached out and swatted Evan’s arm. “Now don’t keep secrets like this, because you know I thrive on gossip.”
“I’ll make you a deal,” Evan said, leaning back in his chair and crossing his arms over his chest. “You’ll be the first person I tell about my next engagement.” He winked to punctuate his point and Emily made a lewd gesture in return.
Emily jostled Tyson back to sleep and asked, “So Nana’s ring, huh? I didn’t think that was CeCe’s style.”
Beckett couldn’t help but agree, yet saying so would likely get his best-man status revoked. Judging from the fact that Mallory hadn’t looked up to meet her sister’s gaze, Beckett knew this was a complicated subject.
Evan ran a bread crust through a trail of gravy and popped it in his mouth whole. He chewed thoughtfully for a moment before continuing. “I thought about getting another ring, but with Nana’s available, I thought it made sense. Plus, Nana would love CeCe.”
Mallory silently stacked dishes, seemingly eager to avoid the conversation.
