Page 70 of Her Lion of a Duke
“And why can’t you let him continue believing that?”
Cecilia frowned at her.“You know perfectly well that I cannot do that. I may not like his cousin, but that does not mean he deserves scorn for something I did. I did this, and only I will bear the consequences.”
“Good.” Beatrice smiled softly. “I am pleased that you are at least thinking soundly in that respect.”
“I have never once thought about letting the blame fall on someone else. I should have known better than to say such awful things, but I was angry and spiteful, and now…”
“Now, you cannot undo it. I understand. Cecilia, we have all done things that we are not proud of, but that does not mean that we cannot change.”
At last, Cecilia looked at her friend square in the eye. Beatrice had grown thinner, yet she was still shapely, and her hair was done in a more fashionable way than it had been before.
“Beatrice, what on earth are you doing?”
“It is nothing,” she replied. “I simply… Well, I do not want to be a wallflower forever. I am running out of time, and if I do not make an effort soon, I will be on the shelf and completely alone.”
“That is not?—”
Cecilia wanted to tell her that she was wrong, but it was the truth. Beatrice had always been afraid to try, and Cecilia had wanted her to change since they met. But now that the changes were happening, she did not like them. She wanted her friend to be herself again.
“My mother says it is for the best,” Beatrice continued. “When she saw the attention your cousin received immediately, she told me that it was time to be more like the other young ladies. When I saw Lady Clara, I could hardly disagree.”
“What my cousin is doing does not matter! Beatrice, if you are going to fall in love, he will have to love you for who you truly are, not this poised and perfect thing you’re trying to be.”
Beatrice sat back triumphantly, her arms folded.
“If you truly believe that,” she said firmly, “you will have no issues telling your husband the truth about whoyoutruly are. After all, if he is going to love you…”
“That is different. We will not love one another, as that is not why we got married.”
“Cecilia, any fool can see that you are in love with him. I could see the beginning of it when we visited, and now it is on full display. If you did not care so deeply for him, you would not be so distraught for hurting him.”
“I can still have decency and respect,” Cecilia argued, but there was no use denying it.
She sighed, taking another sip of her tea.
“I was going to bake today,” Beatrice admitted. “The thing is, I am on a diet, so I cannot eat any of it. Perhaps you might like to help me? Then, you can take what we make back to your husband. It may not make everything right, but some sweetness always helps.”
Cecilia nodded, and they finished their tea before leaving for the kitchens.
Jennings House boasted one of the best kitchens Cecilia had ever seen. There was a large hearth that was perfect for cooking, and a wide assortment of earthenware and mixing utensils. However, her favorite part was the display of copper pans. They were of different shapes and sizes, and they were polished to a shine.
“You should find some for your own kitchen,” Beatrice suggested. “You always look at them when I bring you down here.”
“I can see why you spend so much time in here.”
“Of course you can. It is spacious, the air is cool, and there is no mother telling me to inhale deeply.”
Cecilia cringed slightly, but she tried to hide it.
Beatrice grabbed the ingredients and utensils, and Cecilia helped to weigh everything. Every so often, Beatrice would tut and take over, and Cecilia would step back and watch.
Before she knew it, there was a cake baking, and the kitchen smelled like sugar.
“You did not have to do this with me, you know.” Cecilia smiled.
“I know, but you needed a distraction. Nothing clears your mind quite like the smell of cake, does it?”
“Is that why you bake so often?”
