Page 36 of Her Lion of a Duke
“But it is not the same as family,” she finished for him. “I know how you feel.”
“I meant to ask you about that. You were staying with your aunt this Season. Did something happen to your parents?”
Cecilia laughed sadly, shaking her head. Raindrops flew from her hair, which had slipped from its updo.
“They are well, from what I know. They simply did not want to accompany me to London this year. There was no anger, only boredom. They decided that I, as always, had no intentions of finding a husband, so they did not see the purpose of leaving their beautiful country home for the Season.”
Leonard’s eyebrow rose in surprise. “But they always seemed so supportive of you.”
“They are, but that does not mean they wish to suffer the gossip. My aunt offered to sponsor me so that they could continue enjoying their time. They never liked London very much, so they were all too happy to accept the proposal.”
“Then why didn’t they attend our wedding?”
For once, Cecilia did not know what to say. Their engagement had been rushed, so they didn't have time to send an invitation and have her parents arrive in time. However, it was true that she had yet to tell them about her marriage.
“There would not have been time,” she explained. “I am uncertain as to whether or not they know I am married at all, though I assume my aunt will have told them.”
“Why have you kept it from them? Surely they would be overjoyed!”
“They may well be, but they made their decision. They wanted no part in this Season, so if they miss anything, that is their decision.”
“I thought that it was a pleasant agreement?”
Cecilia stiffened, remembering what had actually taken place. It was the only time she had been summoned to her father’s study, and she had not liked it at all.
“It was an agreement, and the conversation was not unpleasant. Even so, I-I left the room and sat by myself for a while, and I could not help but think that I had done something terribly wrong and that I deserved to be sent away.”
A bolt of lightning flashed through the sky, and she yelped, falling into Leonard. He wrapped his arm around her, heavy but comforting, and she leaned against him.
“I know your father. He would not have done anything if he did not think it would be good for you. I should have contacted him to ask for permission, but given the circumstances, propriety had to wait. Should I write to him, do you think?”
“It is an honorable idea, but no. It would only make him wonder why I could not do it myself. I shall write to him myself once we return home. If we ever do, that is.”
Just as he had done before, Leonard draped his coat over her shoulders. It was a familiar feeling, and it brought even more comfort to her than the first time.
They were on their estate now, away from prying eyes and listening ears. She could be herself, and that was the one thing she had always wanted.
“Families can be difficult,” Leonard said gently after a while. “That is why, should you have any reservations, I will not force you to bear children. I know it is expected of us, but if it is something that you would rather avoid, I can be amenable.”
Cecilia considered that for a moment. Children were not something she had ever mulled over, and she had not spent very much time with them in general. They were perfectly fine, but also a commitment, and though it was indeed an expectation, she did not know if she could fulfill it.
“I shall think on the matter,” she replied, looking ahead. “I have never expected any of that.”
“That is perfectly fine. You may take all the time you need.”
They sat in silence for a while. Cecilia wished she could have given him a better answer. She wished she could have told him what he wanted to hear. For a fleeting moment, she wondered if she would have preferred for him to simply tell her what they would do, for she did not want to disappoint him.
Eventually, the storm cleared, and Leonard rose to his feet, pulling her up with him.
“Would you still like to ride the horses?” he asked.
“Perhaps another time.” She smiled and turned to go back to the house before he could say anything further.
CHAPTER 13
Leonard felt like a fool for bringing up children.
The subject had been on his mind, but broaching it while they were stuck in a small space together, after they had both shown more vulnerability than they would have liked, was not the best time.
