Page 51 of Saxon Blade Norman Blood
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It was time to tell him.
Rowena knew she would have to go in the morning, and now that she had finally accepted that she would never harm him, she had no reason to keep the secret to herself.
She took a deep breath, about to relieve herself of a burden she’d been carrying for too long. “You killed my stepfather.”
Behind her, William grew very still. “Your stepfather?”
“Godric the Redman.”
A pause, then a sigh. He had evidently identified who she was talking about and remembered what had happened. “Yes, I did kill him, but—”
“Do not say it was an accident like with your overlord. Do not think of lying to me!” Rowena’s anger flared, remembering his story of the Comtesse du Vallon. She had no reason to doubt what had happened then, but this time she knew the truth. The attack on Godric had been deliberate. “I was there, hidden, when you plunged your sword into his chest. You meant to do it. It was so savage. The blood… My mother was with me. We saw everything.” She started to shiver uncontrollably at the dreadful memory. “It was no accident.”
William gave a series of frightful curses in her ear then drew away from her. “I had no idea. That woman was your mother?”
“Yes. She was my mother,” Rowena spat, turning around to face him at last. “So you see, I do have my reasons for wanting to kill you, I was not sent to do someone else’s dirty work. First you killed my stepfather in cold blood, then you told your men to use my mother as they wished.”
“What? That’s not what I—” he started, but she was not in the mood to listen to him. Now that she had begun, she could not stop. She was determined he would feel the full extent of her rage and pain. “She was a spoil of war to you, nothing more, soyou called your henchmen and you told them to do what they wanted with her. You didn’t even—”
“Wait, wait, I never said any of those things. Look at me,” he ordered, sitting up in outrage.
She shook her head, refusing to obey.
“Look at me,” he repeated, taking her chin in his hand to force her to meet his gaze. “I cannot let such a terrible accusation pass. Do you really believe I would ask my men to rape a woman, regardless of whether I had just killed her husband or not? Do you? Think carefully before you answer,” he warned, articulating every word.
His eyes flashed in such fury Rowena knew he was telling the truth. He had not had any part in the men’s decision to assault her mother.
“They said… I could not understand them very well at the time, but they said something about Lord William being very generous, and they lunged at her.” Her voice failed her when she remembered their horrid laughs. Despite the finger holding her chin up she averted her gaze.
There was a pause.
“I did kill your stepfather,” William said, sounding marginally calmer. “I had no other choice. He would only have killed me if I hadn’t. And I did call my men into the room afterwards. But I swear I had no idea they would…” He paused and forced her to meet his gaze once more. He looked appalled, horrified even. She bit her lower lip. “They raped her? While you watched?”
“No. In the end they did not. S-she stabbed herself first. The men ran away after that.”
Another muttered curse. “Did she survive the wound?”
Rowena shook her head slowly. “Once the men were gone, I ran to her, but it was too late. She died in my arms.”
“Par tous les saints!” he exclaimed, rubbing a hand over his face like a man trying to chase a nightmarish vision.
“I wanted to find out who the men were, but I could not. I had no idea of their names or whereabouts. I only knew who you were.”
“Therefore you settled on killing me, believing me responsible for the death of your stepfather and the ordeal of your mother.” Silence stretched between them, thick with unspoken words. “I am not responsible for what Gilles and Sylvain did, do you hear, even if Ididkill Godric the Redman. I merely instructed the men to go in and…” His voice trailed, and he paled. “I told them to take care of the widow,” he finished in a deathly voice.
Bile rose in Rowena’s throat. It was clear his men had interpreted his words in a very different light, as an invitation to help themselves to whatever they wanted.
William swore and jumped out of bed, realizing it as well.
“I’m so sorry. This is all my fault. I should not have entrusted such a delicate mission to men I knew to be little more than thugs.” He began to pace around the bed in vivid agitation, his rippling chest pale in the moonlight. “And you saw everything? Dear God. It doesn’t bear thinking about.”
There was such anguish in his voice that she shivered. Instantly he was at her side, wrapping a fur cover over her shoulders.
“I’m so sorry,” he repeated, placing his forehead in contact with hers. “I don’t know how you can even countenance the sight of me.”
Something tightened in Rowena’s guts. He was shouldering the responsibility for the men’s actions when he had done nothing wrong. The relief of knowing he had not known about, much less ordered, her mother’s rape was overwhelming. Then she understood that deep down, she had always known it.That was why she had never been able to steel herself to kill him. Because she knew he was innocent of that crime.
