Page 25 of Loving the Blacksmith
“Yes. There are herbs you can take, I believe. And I can withdraw when I reach my pleasure. I’ve been doing so all my life, as I didn’t want to get any of my lovers with child. You can trust me.” He placed his forehead against hers. He hated alluding to the other women he had bedded in this moment, but he needed to make her understand that he could control his body to protect hers. “You’ve seen my seed erupt in your hand. It should prove to you I don’t have to be inside you when it happens.”
“But… wouldn’t you be frustrated?”
Agnes sounded unsure but there was no doubt in his mind. He would not be frustrated. Hell, at the moment he was considering promising never to possess her, just to make her agree never to leave him.
“No. As long as I get to have you in my forge by day, and in my arms at night, I will be the happiest man in the world. Icannot think of any greater honor than calling you my wife and giving you pleasure. Mine doesn’t count. It can be achieved in other ways.”
She hesitated, as if not daring to admit to a guilty secret. He nodded encouragingly. “I do want children, you know. Just not one every year.”
Everything within him tightened, because he’d been prepared to have her as his wife, knowing they would never have any children. But now she was telling him they could be a family one day. His heart almost overflowed with joy.
“Then it means there will be times when is it safe for me to come inside you, while we try for a babe and while you’re already with child.” He stopped, not sure he should speak out. His body, not so easily cowed, was urging him on. “In any case, if you really were worried about me getting frustrated, know that your delectable little body can offer me other places to reach my release. I could show you some time, if you wanted.”
Heat flared in Agnes’s cheeks, because she knew what Magnus meant. “Do you mean my mouth?”
He appeared stunned at her question, as well he might. What had possessed her to mention this? Would he not be appalled at the extent of her knowledge on carnal matters?
“You know about that?” There was something like hope in his voice, when she had expected disgust. It gave her the courage to answer.
“Yes. I saw two people one night in my village, behind the church. The woman was on her knees in front of the man, pleasuring him in that way.”
The sight had puzzled her at first. What on earth were the two of them doing? Then the man had let out a moan filled with such lewdness that she had felt hot all the way from her scalp to her toes. She should have walked away at that point, but she had been unable to. Strangely fascinated, she had watched the twolovers until the man had given a grunt and gone stock still, his hands gripping his lover’s head with what looked like bruising strength. After a while the woman had stood up laughing, and told him she’d never had to swallow so much in one gulp.
Back home, as she lay on her pallet, Agnes had tried to puzzle out the words. Swallow what exactly? But despite this inexplicable declaration, the idea of taking a man’s member in her mouth had intrigued her. She had lacked the courage to do it in the cave when Magnus had agreed to be pleasured, not wanting to shock him in case he didn’t know about the practice and thought her depraved. After all, she had never heard it mentioned by anyone and when she had started to stroke him, he had begged her to use her hand, not her mouth. But since he was clearly aware of it, she could not resist asking the question.
“Is that what you meant? That you could reach your release in my mouth?” Now, of course, she knew what the woman had had to swallow. The seed she had seen shoot out of him, the seed that would make her with child if it was released inside her. He was right, this could well be a solution to their problem. Her heart surged in hope. Could a future together be possible?
“Yes.” Magnus cleared his throat. “Amongst other things.”
It was her turn to be stunned. Other things? What on earth could he mean? Clearly she’d been a fool for thinking herself more experienced than him. Not only did he know all about women taking men into their mouths, but he knew about other deeds she could not even start to suspect. “What do you?—”
“Hush, lovely. This is a discussion for another time. Right now, I’m waiting for an answer to my question. The question I asked you in the woods the other day.”
She bit the inside of her mouth. “Of course, I want to marry you. How can you doubt it?” Had he not seen by now that her refusal had nothing to do with him?
He hesitated. “Because I was never anyone’s first choice. I think I told you about it.”
“Yes. You told me your parents always preferred your brother. But surely that’s not the same...” Her voice died in her throat when she saw him grimace. This man, tall and confident, as awe-inspiring as a Norse deity, was unsure about his inability to attract a wife?
“It’s not all. A few years ago, I bedded a woman from the village called Edith. She was a young widow, and I thought we might come to an understanding. I started to think I should perhaps make her my wife. Then I discovered she was also sharing Sigurd’s bed.” He paused and swallowed, as if the memory of the discovery caused him pain. “I did not let it deter me. After all, she did not owe me anything at the time and we had never discussed the future. When Sigurd met Frigyth and it became obvious he would not see Edith anymore, I thought I had won and I asked for her hand. She hesitated at first. Then finally, a few weeks later, she said yes.”
Of course she had. A woman had to be mad to refuse such a man’s offer. Or mortally scared of the consequences and determined to remain a virgin, like her. Agnes couldn’t think of any other reason.
“What happened?”
“I found out that having accepted my offer had not put a stop to her ways. She carried on seducing all the men she thought worthy of interest, and there were many of them, by all accounts. One day, just before our wedding, a Dane called Rune visited the village. She threw herself at him.”
“And you saw them together?” She was aghast.
“No. But I heard her tell the woman who had borne Rune’s child that she was not sure she wanted to marry me after all. She only kept up the pretense because I was the richest man in thevillage and she wanted to make the most of that, but she had no intention of being tied down to one man, least of all one who...”
Everything tensed within Agnes. What was he about to reveal? That woman, Edith, sounded awful, but what if her refusal had been motivated by some flaw in Magnus that she, Agnes, had not seen yet? It was possible. Their acquaintance was short.
“One who...” she encouraged, not sure she was ready to hear what the issue might be. But if they really were to marry, she had to find out now, before it was too late.
“One who was adequate at best in bed.”
Adequate?
