Page 10 of A Husband for Esyllt
“How dare you laugh!” Esyllt cried out when he let out a snort at the memory of how he had been forced to palm himselfbefore going to sleep. His release had left him hollow. “Don’t laugh!”
“Do you mean that laughing is only allowed at certain moments here in Wales?” He emptied the rest of his goblet of wine in one gulp. “Well, I’ll be sure to familiarize myself with your customs. Laughter is apparently considered a high offense if done at the wrong moment, whereas the attitude to murder is surprisingly lax and guests can expect to find themselves abducted in the middle of the night. Who would have thought?”
“Do you think we could have a serious conversation?” his wife asked with a tilt of the head. To Connor’s surprise, he felt his lips quiver anew. Perhaps despite the lack of sensual gratification, his wedding night would not be a total waste. Esyllt’s spirit seemed enough to offer some compensation for the relief her body would not give him.
“By all means, let us have a serious conversation. As I was saying, Matthew volunteered to take my place, leaving me free to explore the castle unimpaired and enquire about the people’s loyalties without raising suspicion.”
“So... That is why you spent the whole evening watching me yesterday? Because you wanted to ascertain where my allegiance lay?”
There was no mistaking the bitterness in her voice. She was disappointed. She’d thought he was drawn to her as a woman, and now she was being told he had merely been on the lookout for proof of her treachery. It would be a sobering realization. Except that it was not quite what had motivated his scrutiny of her.
It was true that he had observed the others to ascertain where their loyalty lay, but he had watched her first and foremost because he’d been drawn to her. And he had not missed the looks she’d thrown him when she’d thought him Matthew’s squire. She’d been equally smitten. At the time, hehad congratulated himself, thinking that the revelation of his identity would be a pleasant surprise, since he appealed to her as a man. Of course, this had been before she’d had him bound and brought to her like a pagan offering, for her to use as she saw fit.
If she had been so quick to act on her interest for a man, would she not do the same thing the next time someone caught her eye? Was he married to a promiscuous woman, one who would make a fool out of him by taking scores of lovers?
Esyllt had claimed she merely wanted Lord Sheridan to walk in on them and change his mind about marrying her. But what if desire for him had been the main motivation for the scandalous encounter? What if she’d only used this as a ready excuse to justify her behavior? She could not be naïve enough to ignore how a man would react when a beautiful woman wrapped her legs around him. It had not taken much to convince her to surrender to his need. A man she had met only earlier that evening, whose name she didn’t even know, had been in her bed and between her thighs moments after he had entered the room. She had welcomed him inside her body as readily as if they’d shared this intimacy a thousand times, she had been slick and hot for him, even though he had barely touched her. Such responsiveness was promising to a lover, but worrying to a husband.
Connor clenched his jaw when memories of the previous night assaulted him. Damn it, now was not the time to get hard. He needed to think clearly. This woman would make him lose his mind if he allowed her to.
He focused his mind back to what they were discussing.
“Yes, I thought Matthew’s idea had some merit.”
“Only because you are prejudiced and distrustful of Welsh people!”
“You’re right, it would be silly of me to be suspicious of them. After all, apart from being half-strangled in my sleep, trussed uplike a fowl and brought to the lady of the castle so she could have her wicked way with me behind her husband’s back, nothing of note happened to me since I arrived.” He twisted his lips in a mocking smile.
“You were never in any real danger,” she pointed out, refusing to be impressed, and once again he was struck by her courage. His lovely wife would be a formidable opponent.
“No, I know. Being alone with a half-naked woman is not what I would call dangerous. She was more intent on making love to me than piercing my heart.” Fire ignited in his loins when he remembered how tightly her wet softness had wrapped around him. Ah, this had to stop! Why couldn’t he focus on the conversation? “Still, I’m sure Matthew would think his precautions wise if he knew what happened between us this morning.”
If…
That one word was enough to send hope coursing through Esyllt’s veins.
“You mean he doesn’t know?” Could it be that her humiliation had not been spread around the English retinue? She had been bracing herself for lewd comments all day, waiting for the moment when someone would ask her if all Welsh women were as hot-blooded and free with their favors as she was. Now she knew why no one had so much as looked at her with a suggestive smile.
“No one knows what happened in this room except you,” Connor confirmed. “And me.”
She shivered at the threat contained in those two words. He would never let her forget how she had opened her legs to him. As for her, she would forever remember the way he had made her body heat up and her inhibitions melt like wax in front of a flame.
It was all a disaster. Not only had she given him reason to doubt her modesty moments after meeting him, but she was finding out that even before their marriage vows had been taken, her husband had been wary of her and her people’s intentions. She could have been the most welcoming bride imaginable, he would still have observed her from a distance, and waited for her to prove him and his wretched brother right.
Deception, disappointment, distrust... Could there be worse ways to start a marriage?
“Why didn’t you tell anyone about what I did?”
He cocked his head, as if displeased that she thought him capable of such treachery. “Would you rather I had? I can if you prefer. Usually, I share everything with Matthew, so I could?—”
“No!” She was horrified by the prospect. He had just told her that, contrary to what she had feared, she was safe from humiliation. Why on earth would she want it any different? All the same, she did not understand why he had spared her when it was obvious he did not feel too kindly about his new wife.
By now, Esyllt was utterly confused. Connor had come to bed her but was talking to her instead. He was calm, as if it were not embarrassing for a man to be denied his marital rights, he was talking about their “coupling” without getting aroused and smiling as if her wantonness the night before pleased him when she knew it should not.
All in all, it was as if... She hesitated in formulating the thought, then could not avoid the conclusion any longer. He liked her spirit.
It was the most disconcerting thing of all.
“Why didn’t you tell your brother what I did?” she repeated slowly.
