Page 25 of Riftborne
How many times had this happened in the last few weeks? How many times had I noticed myself slipping? How many times had I felt the tendrils of force send shivers across my skin? Threatening to implode and take me over.
And for simple things. Unavoidable things. Things that were inevitable unless I holed up in my room and never left.
It didn’t matter where I went, how much distance I put between myself and Luminaria. There would always be risk. I would always be a danger.
And if tonight was any indication, my powers were just going to get worse–more and more uncontrollable until they destroyed everything around me.
I was a bomb that could explode at any moment.
A suffocating truth hung heavy in my bones: part of me didn’t want to stop. The power was overwhelming, maddening, hungry… and the darkest, most brutal shade of temptation. It was going to win next time, as it had done outside the Grove.
What if this had happened while I was with Osta?
I couldn’t bear to let that train of thought continue.
Brushing away my tears, I moved into a sitting position. It felt like a decision had been made for me. I couldn’t be selfish and afraid anymore. And running wouldn’t fix this.
If there could be a way out, some light at the end of the tunnel, I had to take it.
I had to try.
I owed it to Osta, to Ma.
Maybe I even owed it to myself.
CHAPTER 9
The moon loomed,casting silvery light throughout the alleyways. The rain had stopped, but I was still drenched, in both water and regret.
I stood and glanced around, hoping to avoid the gaze of any passerby. A sigh of relief escaped me when the empty street confirmed I was alone.
A part of me wanted to find the General tonight and tell him my answer, even if only to absolve myself of the guilt that now hung heavy in my limbs.
But it was too late. There’s no way I’d be warmly welcomed if I barged up to his door at this hour. Sibyl only knew what situation I would be… walking in on. A shudder ran through me. No, it would have to be first thing tomorrow morning.
I trudged towards our apartment, hoping to find Osta there. It looked just as we’d left it that morning. She was still out.
I had become accustomed to waiting over the last few days, I could handle it for a few more moments…
The tension clawing at the back of my neck said otherwise.
I kicked off my shoes before laying down the few bags ofgroceries I was able to rescue off the street. Eyeing them, I pursed my lips.Great. I’d also have to explain what happened to the rest of our purchases.
I hit our recycled couch with a thud, and my hand found its way into my hair, releasing it from its drenched knot. My eyes still burned from the tears, and my knees thrummed with pain from my fall, but nothing came close to the guilt I felt for letting my pride get the best of me. And if I was being honest, that had been going on far longer than just this week.
A key turned in the door, and Osta peeked in, searching the room with trepidation. Her eyes widened as her gaze met mine. I sat up and pulled my legs into a crossed position on the couch.Where to begin?
“Osta, can we talk? I really need to apologize to you,” I murmured, trying to keep my voice level. Her eyes softened and she threw her head back, sighing, before leaning against the creaking door frame.
“Do you know how nervous I’ve been to come home? After I stormed off, I started thinking about everything, and I felt so terrible, Fia. I shouldn’t pu–”
“Osta,” I interrupted, shaking my head. “There’s no reason for you to feel bad. I’m the one who needs to apologize… You were right. About everything.”
Her eyes flickered with surprise, and then amusement. A smile crept up her lips.
“Did you just say I was right? About everything?” She teased, finally walking over to sit on the couch.
“I know, they're novel words coming from me.” I attempted a smile, feeling heavy. There was still so much to unload.
