Page 47 of Twilight at Croftwood Library
They went outside and wandered to the mulled wine stall where Oliver ordered two then they walked into the churchyard and found an empty bench to sit on.
‘Where’s Amy today?’
He sighed. ‘She’s gone to her mum and dad’s for a few days. We had a bit of a humdinger the other day and she said she needed a break,’ he explained.
‘Oh.’ Lois didn’t know what to say to that. If she asked him about it, he might tell her, and she wasn’t sure she was ready to hear any more about the intricacies of their relationship. ‘Are you okay?’ she said in the end.
‘I don’t know. It’s been really hard, Lois. I’ve tried to get things back to how they were before…you know. We’ve both been on a different journey for at least a year and to be honest, I never thought she’d want me back. Even before we split up, we’d grown so far apart. I can see that now. As soon as we split, I thought I wanted her back, until recently when I’d finally got over it all and then when she turned up wanting exactly that…it feels too late.’
‘Have you told her that?’ asked Lois gently.
‘No, how can I after all she’s been through.’ He was looking down at the floor as he spoke.
‘You’ve been through it too.’
‘She doesn’t think it was hard for me like it was for her. She thinks I left her at the time she needed me most, at least that’s what she says when she’s upset. There are other times when she admits it was the best thing I could have done but,’ he shrugged sadly, ‘it’s hard to know what she really thinks, whether she blames me for how hard it’s been for her.’ He turned to look at Lois, tears threatening to spill from his eyes.
She took his drink and set it on the floor with her own then put her arms around him and held him. He buried his face in her shoulder for a minute then pulled away, wiped his eyes with a finger and thumb and smiled.
‘God. Sorry about that. It doesn’t seem fair to be dumping on you, of all people.’
‘Don’t apologise.’ She handed his drink back to him, her heart aching briefly at his reference to what might have been if not for Amy. ‘It’s good to let it out once in a while. If it makes you feel better, I had my own moment last weekend when Alex’s stuff finally went. I honestly thought I was fine with it, and I am, but I did have a good cry on the sofa afterwards.’
He smiled at her. ‘A bit of Christmas is just what you need.’
‘Ditto. Who knew you loved Christmas so much?’
‘Who says I do?’ he teased.
‘The fairy lights speak volumes. I think it’s been proven that there’s a direct correlation between the number of sets of fairy lights a person owns and how much they love Christmas.’
‘Is that right? So, I should expect to see quite a few at the library?’
‘Well, you know, the ceilings are very high, and I don’t want to be pushy because not everyone loves Christmas but my house will be a different story.’
‘I’d expect nothing less.’
The way he was looking at her made her heart feel as if it was going to inflate like a balloon and soar out of her chest.
She took a deep breath. ‘You know where I am whenever you need to talk. Honestly, I mean it.’
‘Thanks. Likewise.’
They walked back to the coffee house in companionable silence then Lois said goodbye and went back to the library with the lukewarm coffees in her hand hoping that she could manage to be good friends with Oliver without wanting to subconsciously sabotage his relationship with Amy. That wasn’t her intention at all, but it was hard to see someone she cared about being thrown around on an emotional rollercoaster when he thought he’d got off it months before.
‘Sorry the coffees aren’t very hot,’ apologised Lois as she handed them out. ‘I ended up chatting to Oliver on the way back. The coffee house looks amazing, it’s full of fairy lights.’
‘Amy’s doing, no doubt,’ said Rosemary with a hint of pride which Lois chose to ignore, holding back from pointing out that Amy was nowhere to be seen.
‘Has it started to get busy yet?’ asked Linda. ‘I’d love to have a mooch around the craft stalls once it’s dark. They’ll all be lit with fairy lights as well.’
‘Go whenever you want to, Linda. You too, Rosemary. I’m happy to hold the fort here.’
‘You should go and see the light switch-on, Lois as it’s your first Christmas in Croftwood. I can look after things here later on,’ said Rosemary.
Lois was touched. She had wanted to watch the lights going on but as it was her regular day to work, hadn’t thought she’d be able to.
At quarter to five, Lois and Linda left the library and headed to the top of the high street where everyone was gathering around the Christmas tree. There was a choir singing carols and children were holding lanterns that lit up their little faces, full of the joy of Christmas. The mayor gave a short speech and then all the streetlights were switched off.
