Page 114 of Jace
I scoff, unsurprised, and tap my fingers against my leg. “It’s the team, the sport, and everything that comes with it that I’m worried about.”
“And that’s perfectly understandable, I get that. I know our team would be fine with it from experience,” he says gesturing at himself, “but it was different for me, there was less at stake.” Tuck shrugs his big shoulders.
“How come?”
“Because I ain’t you.”
I frown in question.
He waves a hand erratically my way. “You’re like a superstar, man. I’m good, I’m fit for college football, but I’m notgreat.I’m not meant for the NFL. I know that I’m playing my last games next season, and that’s okay. But you?” He slants his head. “You’re one of those rare players that only come along every few years.”
“Don’t jinx it, dude,” I say, shaking my head.
“I know, I know,” he chuckles as he knocks the wooden doorpost beside him with his knuckles. “But you know it, I know it, coaches know it. Christ, all those agents and those reporters know it. So I understand why you would want to stay in the closet, preferring not to have to deal with all that hassle. I know it’s sort of accepted now, but unfortunately bigots do still exist.”
“I’m not even sure if I want to come out...”
“And that’s okay too. It’s your choice, Ty. You don’thaveto do anything you don’t want to. There are probably dozens of closeted players out there who are living their best lives on the field, can be themselves in the privacy of their home, and still have a content life.”
I nod, focus still on my boyfriend, who’s now in some sort of slow dance with Ava and Missy, the three of them mushed together in a tight hug and slowly swaying in circles. He meetsmy eyes over the top of Ava’s head, and I just see him fucking melt, cheek on top of her head, focus solely on me.
The term boyfriend doesn’t even cover what he is to me. He’s so much more than a boyfriend, more than what I ever would’ve thought possible.
“But it would be great as well, you know?” Tuck continues, following my gaze.
“How come?” I croak, already knowing what he’s gonna say.
“Because if you would come out? A player like you? It would open so many doors for the queer society, man.”
I nod again, knowing that, but shit… I rub my face again. “I would be in the spotlight.” I hate the spotlight.
“Ty?” His tone is serious now, so I meet his eyes, which are looking at me sternly.
“Yeah?”
“You’re stupid if you think you wouldn’t be in the spotlight even if the world thinks you're straight.”
And oh, how he got me there.
It’s inevitable either way, I know that. Like I said, I wouldn’t want to jinx anything. But I know my stats, I know my scores, I recognize all the agents that keep popping up. I don’t like to talk about it much, I’m a modest guy really, but I doknow.
So truth be told, he’s right. I’ll be scrutinized no matter what.
It’s just up to me how I would like my story to be told.
And fuck, we’ve only been together a couple of months now, it’s so new, but the itch to go to Jace and justholdhim is so very big.
And we both know that this is real. Yes, it’s new, but it’s so veryveryreal.
More real than anything ever really was in my life.
And if it wouldn’t work out? Would I be okay with being an out player? I take in Tuck again, who is now accepting a newbeer from Miller–which he shouldn’t take, because of the game tomorrow–who joins us in our spot against the wall.
Tuck in his very tight Witcher’s outfit. Way too tight than what I can remember of the show. But he just owns it. Owns who he is and doesn’t give a fuck about what everyone else thinks of him, what they say about him.
And yeah, that shit’s admirable.
So fuck it.
