Page 61 of Feels Like Home
"Yeah, a little," she answers, staring out the window.
"What do you think you might have?" I ask, pouring hot water into two mugs. "The flu? A headache? A cold?"
"I don't know…"
"Have you gone to see a doctor?"
"No."
"Have you finished the book yet?"
"Yes."
I swear it's like pulling teeth. I swirl the tea bags, watching the water darken while I try to figure out what the hell is going on with her.
I walk over to the nook and hand her her tea. "Would you like me to make you a sandwich or something?"
"No. I'm fine, thanks."
"Okay, Mom. Something is clearly up. You're acting weird." I slide in opposite her. "What is going on?"
She turns her head slowly toward me, her hazel eyes glassy, and announces with zero emotion, "I'm pregnant."
I start coughing as the tea burns its way down the wrong pipe. "Excuse me?"
"I'm not coming down with anything, Courtland. I lied, okay? I'm having a baby."
"But how?" I rack my brain for a second. "You're forty-nine."
"Forty-eight."
"Doesn't make much difference. There's still less than a two percent chance of conceiving naturally at your age."
"Guess I'm in the lucky two percent," she says with a sigh.
"How long have you known for?"
"Since just after the holidays."
"How far along are you?"
"Four months."
I glance down at her robe in shock even though it's too early for her to be showing much. It's thick and oversized, so it's hard to see anything anyway.
I glance back up at her. This is literally the last thing I was expecting.
"What are you going to do?"
"I'm keeping it, Courtland," she snaps as if I were inferring something else. "I could never get rid of a child. Even if I didn't?—"
She stops herself from saying what she was about to, but I think I know where she was going.
Even if I didn't want it.
Tears well in my eyes, which I quickly blink away. Not ready to deal with that just yet, even though it's something I've always suspected.
"I respect your decision," I say, treading carefully. "But you do realize this is considered a high-risk pregnancy, right? There’s a bigger risk of complications like gestational diabetes, high blood pressure, and chromosomal abnormalities. You'll need more frequent monitoring."
