Page 5 of Feels Like Home
Buzz shakes his head, smiling at me, his white teeth all perfect and shiny. "Can you ever not be a hero?"
"I get called many things. That's usually not one of them."
"I'm so happy you're back. How long are you staying for?"
Before I can answer, my mother calls out, "Courtland!"
"Hey, Mom."
She reaches us, and we exchange a brief hug. I explain why I missed the funeral.
"Well, it's good you made it," she says, every word perfectly controlled and measured.
And so begins the first of what I’m sure will be many awkward silences between us.
When a parent does something so bad it fundamentally upends the traditional parent-child dynamic, it's a hard thing to recover from. I'm at a place where I've forgiven her for what she did, but it's created a distance between the two of us we haven't been able to bridge in over thirteen years.
Because even worse than her cheating was what happened once it came out into the open—she didn't fight to save her marriage. She just stood by and watched as Dad moved the two of us to Boston.
And the real kicker? She's aromance novelist. She spends her days crafting stories about love and trust and the importance of having good relationships, something she's failed at miserably in her own life.
"I should get back to everyone," she says with a tight smile. "Are you staying with Brock?"
This would normally be the part where Buzz interjects since no one calls him by his legal name, but he's drifted away from us. Partly, I suspect, to give us some privacy, but probably mainly because he's uncomfortable being around her. It's amazing how something that happened so long ago can still affect us all these years later.
That's the real reason why I don't return to Clovelly as often as I'd like to. Too many painful memories come roaring back to life, and I don't like that one bit.
"No. I'm staying at the inn," I reply since Buzz's twin brother, Howie, is crashing in his spare room after getting injured in the season opener.
Buzz and Howie both seem to have done a better job of moving on from the affair. They have a pretty good relationship with their dad. I want the same with Mom, but for whatever reason, we just can't seem to make it work.
"Of course. I'll…see you later?"
I nod vaguely. "Sure."
She leaves, and Buzz throws an arm over my shoulder. "That went well."
"Totally," I mutter, my gaze sweeping across the sea of people, eager to move on. Looks like almost everyone in town turned up.
"You okay?"
"Yep."
"Who are you trying to find?" he asks. I shoot him a look to say he knows exactly who. He chuckles and shakes his head but doesn't let go of me. "You can't seriously be jealous of someone you haven't met."
"I totally can. How dare you make a friend without me. And axe throwing, really?"
"What? Zane and I are just hanging out. After Cameron dumped me for being too needy and with Howie injured and unable to do much other than mope, it's nice to have someone to do stuff with."
"But axe throwing?" I repeat, just in case my tone wasn't mocking enough the first time.
"Zane finds cool activities to do around town. Axe throwing was fun. Last week we went to a silent book club."
"A what?"
"A silent book club."
"What the hell is that?"
