Page 2 of Fake As Puck
“You okay?” she asks. Eyes wide now. Like suddenly I’m the fragile one in this situation.
Honestly, the whites of her eyes are showing a little too much and she’s giving a strong “human version of a deer blinking at oncoming traffic” vibe. And it’s making her look... less cute.
“Yeah. Yes.” I nod again. (That’s like four nods now. Do I have a tic?) “I am okay. I guess I’m just in shock.”
Her eyes soften. “I know. I’m sorry. Last night was the last shot. I’m just not feeling it. You’re not mad, are you?”
I shake my head and grab my water again, mostly for something to do with my hands.
“No.”
But I told all my teammates I had a girlfriend.
I told my neighbor I was taken so she’d stop FaceTiming her niece every time I carried groceries in.
I booked a couples’ massage after the wedding because I thought, “hey, romance is effort.”
I told my sister to quit making thirst-trap TikToks about her single hockey player brother… which went disgustingly viral, by the way.
I smile at her. “Not mad at all.”
She stands. Fidgets. Takes a few slow steps like she’s trying to ease out of a bear trap.
“For what it’s worth, it’s not you. My ex messaged me, and when I realized how excited I was, I knew that wasn’t fair to you.”
But you slept with me anyway?
Cool cool cool cool cool.
“I get it,” I say with a forced smile. “Don’t apologize.”
“I didn’t,” she says.
Shit.
My bad.
“Right. Sorry. Uh, yeah, it’s no problem. You should get back with your ex.”
“He was abusive,” she says, and my entire nervous system hits the brakes like a full-body record scratch.
Oh.
I stare. Because I don’t know what else to do. My thoughts just fled the building.
“I just have things I need to work out on my own,” she adds.
I nod again. Jesus Christ, I need to stop nodding before my neck gives out.
“Yeah. Yes. It’s no problem, Bea.”
She disappears down the hallway, and I stare into the middle distance like I’ve just been hit by a bus I saw coming a mile away but was too polite to dodge.
Don’t react. Don’t be dramatic. Just vibe through the heartbreak, man.
I shake my head slowly, sipping my water.
Then she reappears.
