Page 101 of Fair Play
She definitely wasn’t supposed to make me fall in love with her.
But she is and she did.
And I just told my boss that I’m okay with being traded away from the best thing to ever happen to me because her jerk of a brother deserves his chance. I’m one injury away from the end, so it makes sense to bet on Bodi. Not the old guy who doesn’t bring anything but experience to the table.
Fuck.
I get dressed and freshen up before wandering downstairs. I’ve tried not to get in the way of Marty and Stevie’s routine, especially now that we’re in the throes of the playoffs and she’s buried in wedding planning. Their wedding is at the end of June in Paris, so the formal dining room has been turned into a staging area. Folders and magazines, lists and samples, books and sketches. I’ve never seen anything like it, certainly not for either of my weddings.
Of course, I never married a supermodel.
“Hey, you ready to go?” Marty asks me when I get to the kitchen. “We can stop at a drive-through if you want to grab something?”
We’d decided to drive to practice together so I nod. “Yeah. Let’s go.”
“I hear Brad woke you up this morning. Sorry about that.”
I chuckle. “It’s no biggie. He’s fun.”
Marty rolls his eyes. “I mean, sometimes…”
We get in his SUV and he heads toward a drive-thru.
“You okay?”
“I don’t know how to answer that,” I admit. “I’m putting one foot in front of the other, trying to focus on hockey, but it’s not easy.”
“It’s not. I found out my wife was fucking one of my teammates on a road trip, so I understand the distraction, the turmoil. But you need to put it all on the back burner until the season is over.”
“Doing my best.” I stare out the window, trying not to show any more vulnerability than necessary. He’s been a good friend to me but I’m not ready to talk about the mess I’m in beyond what he already knows.
“If you love her, she’ll still be there this summer.”
“She said she wouldn’t.”
“When?”
“Yesterday. I asked for some time to figure out some things and she told me to take all the time I need because she won’t be there when I’m done.”
“That was hurt talking.”
“It was. But I know Billie. She’s torn between me and her brother, so I had to take that choice off the table. There’s no way in hell I can make her choose. For whatever reason, he doesn’t want us together, so…”
“He’ll get over it. He has to. Because he’ll drive her away all on his own if he keeps this up.”
“He needs therapy,” I say. “Billie thinks it’s because he never got help for the trauma of losing his parents the way he did. Now that trauma is manifesting itself in being overprotective with her. And it’s random, like he was fine with her living in a dorm in college, as long as they were in the same city, but when he moved to L.A. he wouldn’t leave her behind. And he seems to think hockey players are the worst human beings on the planet.”
“He’s projecting,” Marty says after a moment. “He’s always on the prowl. And he’s single, so more power to him, but it’s not fair to paint us all in the same light.”
“To be fair, I’ve been divorced twice and haven’t always been a good guy in relationships.”
“Have you been good to Billie?”
I take a few seconds to think about that.
Have I?
I think back to us going skating in Venice. Helping her get on the ice on Easter. Introducing her to my family. Giving her my dad’s car. So many ways I tried to show her I cared.
