Page 144 of The Silent War
“Em—“
“I kept replaying everything,” I spoke over him, “every word, every touch. Wondering which moment made me too much, too little, so easy to forget.”
Tears blurred my vision now. Suddenly the words couldn’t stop everything I’d held in for years. Three years.
“I didn’t sleep. I stopped eating. I’d get dressed for events and break down in the car because there was no text waiting for me after. I went to therapy, Bastion. A dynasty daughter. In therapy. Do you know what thatmeans? I had to make up lies about why I was tired and why it looked like I was grieving someone who was stillalive.”
The tears fell freely now, but I didn’t wipe them.
“Because you didn’t just ghost me. Youburiedme. With no warning. Like none of it ever mattered.” I gulped in air, “Now I’ll be your secret until you forget me again...”
There is some pain you wouldn’t even wish on your enemy. What they did to me, that type of pain wasn’t forgivable.One minute, I’m the centre of their world, and they were mine, and then nothing. Not even the courage to say goodbye.
His thumbs froze on my jaw. I tried to turn my head. To pull back. But his hands didn’t move. So, I clenched my eyes shut, trying to block him out. I didn’t want to feel him.
“No, baby,” he said. “Don’t do that.”
His forehead pressed harder into mine, pleading now. Desperate.
“Don’t shut me out. Please,pleaselook at me. Emilia,” he said, softer this time. “I know I don’t deserve to ask, but I’m asking anyway. Please… don’t turn it off. Don’t shut down. Not with me.”
His thumbs brushed my cheekbones, wiping my tears away.
“Please, baby…” Bastion’s voice cracked. “Don’t leave me here like this.”
I kept my eyes closed.
“Fuck…Emilia, please,” he begged, he gently kissed my forehead, “Please.You don’t have to forgive me. You don’t even have to say a word. Just look at me. Justlook.”
His hands moved, one slipping to my neck, the other to the back of my head as if holding me there might stop the distance already between us.
“You’re killing me,” he whispered. “You think we walked away? Webledfor it. I’ve been living with the sound of your silence in my head every fucking day since.”
He was trembling now.
“I’m begging you,” Bastion choked. “Don’t shut me out. Iswearto you, I won’t survive it this time.”
His hands stayed on me, desperate, grounding, anchoring himself to me.
“Baby, please.” He said it again, quieter this time. “Please.”
I could feel his breath against my cheek, felt how uneven it was.
“Baby,” he whispered like it was a prayer. “Please.Look at me.”
And then, quietly, barely audible, I broke. The tears now uncontrollable.
His thumbs brushed under my eyes again, gentle. Like he thought he could smooth away my pain. “Okay, baby,” his voice trembled, “Okay… I’ll fix this.”
His hands were everywhere now, cupping my face, stroking my cheeks, cradling the sides of my head like I might disappear if he let go.
“I’ll fix us,” he swore, as if saying it enough times might make it true. “I’ll fixeverything,okay? Just…just give me the chance. Let me put us back together.”
I didn’t move. Didn’t speak. There was nothing to put together.
“Please, baby. Ineedto believe I can fix this.”
His forehead dropped to mine again. “I can do it. I can make it right. Just say the word and I’ll burn the world down to start again. For you. Forus.”
