“You want to learn about me?” she asked, tugging on the blanket until he shifted so she could pull it off. “Fine. Let’s start with my legs.” Rather than meet his gaze, she just waved her hands at her legs. “Remember how strong they once were?” She lifted one with her hands, watching it fall to the bed in a tangle. “Noodles, Reece. They’re like noodles.” Before he could react, she lifted her shirt and lowered her panties. “Then there’s this. Isn’t this the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen? Oh, wait, you’ve seen the whole catheter debacle already. How could I forget? That means you’ve seen my beautiful para-belly, too. What’s that? Well, it’s the sagging and bagging of my paralyzed muscles being dragged down by my internal organs. I have to wear a binder during the day so I don’t feel like my insides are falling out. Sexy, right? Should we keep going?”
Reece’s hand touched hers, and he leaned over her until she was forced to meet his gaze. “Angel, stop. None of this is about your body.”
“What is it about then, Land?” she whisper-asked. “This is my body, and there’s no changing it.”
“I wouldn’t want to, Sky. Don’t you see? This body has made you who you are today. You would not be the person you are today if that accident hadn’t happened. You can look at that as a positive or a negative for sure, and I see both sides, but when I look at you, all I see is strength and determination. I can’t sit here and listen to the girl I’ve cared about my entire life show me her body with tears in her eyes and anger in every word, as though she doesn’t deserve to be cherished by someone because of something beyond her control. Let me be clear, Sky. That is false. You are beautiful, and any man would be lucky to spend his days with you.”
When he broke eye contact, she sucked in a deep breath, still fighting back tears when he lowered his head to her left leg and kissed his way from her ankle to her thigh. He tenderly massaged her skin as he made his way north. She couldn’t feel it as anything other than pressure, but watching him do it made those tears fall over her lashes. Land tenderly loved her other leg the same way before he positioned them again on the pillow. When he finished, he knelt on the floor and massaged her hip bones that jutted out on each side, the catheter dead center and still taped to her skin instead of coiled in her bag. His thumbs worked their way across her abdomen, stroking the skin on each side of the stoma. It was healed now to nothing more than a small hole the tube went through, and he leaned down, pressing a kiss to the skin just above it.
“Land, don’t,” she whispered, the tears falling at the idea of his tender touch that she couldn’t feel.
“Why are you crying?” he asked, reaching up to wipe away a tear.
“I never wanted you to see me this way.”
“Sweetheart, I can’t tell you how much I wish you’d have talked to me. We could have worked through it together, because you are turning me on in a way I can’t hide.” She raised a surprised brow, and he shrugged, standing so she could see the outline of his maleness through his jeans. “My body doesn’t lie, Sky.”
He lowered his head again and kissed across her ribs, where there was still minimal sensation. “I can’t feel you against my skin, and it’s killing me,” she whimpered.
In a heartbeat, he’d removed her T-shirt, pausing long enough to gaze at the lacy bra that hooked in the front. Land’s growl was low and throaty when he unsnapped itand pulled it away. With all the patience and tenderness in the world, he kissed his way up to her left nipple before slipping it between his lips to tease with his tongue.
“Land!” she cried softly, arching her chest to get closer to him.
“You can feel that?” he asked, barely releasing her breast long enough to ask.
“It feels so good.” She cried out again when he grasped her other nipple between his fingers and rolled it gently while he lavished her other one with his tongue. To throw her off, he switched sides, and she couldn’t stop the eruption of sensation that filled her. “Land,” she whimpered as the waves flowed over her. “Don’t stop, please,” she begged, riding the sensations high up into the sky, where she lost track of her thoughts and anything but how good it felt to be loved by this man.
When she came back to earth, he was holding her in his arms, teasing her earlobe with his tongue and teeth. “That was unexpected,” he whispered, kissing her behind the ear. “Are you okay?”
“Better than okay.” Her laughter was soft when she answered. “I’m literally on cloud nine. Since I don’t have a lot of sensation in my lower half…” She paused, unsure what she should tell him.
“Be honest with me, angel. I want to know everything,” he whispered in her ear. The sensation sent a shiver down her shoulders and pooled at her nipples again, making them tingle.
“My erogenous zones are different than other women,” she explained. “I can only orgasm through intercourse if I have direct G-spot stimulation. My breasts, on the other hand, are highly orgasmic.”
His soft laughter in her ear made her smile, her tears long gone after his tender loving. “I noticed. I loved every second of it, too.”
“You did?” She tried to position herself so she could see him. He propped a pillow behind her back and held her waist to steady her.
Rather than answer, he held her hand to the front of his jeans. “I did.” When she rubbed her hand across his hardness, his eyes rolled back in his head, and he moaned. “Is this a dream, or are you touching me right now?”
“It’s not a dream unless I’m in the same one,” she whispered, sliding her hand under the waistband of his pants to feel his heat. His gasp was loud when he pressed himself against her hand, his eyes closed and his body vibrating with her touch. “We can’t do this.”
“Do what?” she asked, grasping him through his boxers and reveling in the way his breath hitched. This was the most unexpected moment of her life, and she wanted to memorize it for when they parted ways again.
“Make love,” he whispered, thrusting against her hand. “We’re not prepared.”
“I’m on the pill, Land.”
“Not that,” he whispered, grasping her hand to still her. “I refuse to endanger you for my satisfaction. After some research, I know that for a woman with a spinal cord injury to enjoy making love, planning is required or—”
“I’ll have another episode of autonomic dysreflexia?” His nod was enough for her to know he had done his research. “It’s possible, but there are ways to prevent it and have a satisfying sex life.”
When he took her lips, his kiss was hungry and demanding. When he finally broke for air, they were both panting.“I’m satisfied just being able to kiss and touch you, sweetheart. I don’t need more right now. We can wait.”
“Your body tells a different story,” she whispered, squeezing his hard maleness. His moan told her she wasn’t wrong.
“I just want to kiss you and hold you in my arms. It makes me feel like all the years that passed don’t exist anymore.”