Page 32 of The German's Guilty Pleasure
She glanced at me out of the corner of her eye. “I’m not making a spreadsheet.”
“Paraphrase for me?” I asked instead, hoping she would engage with me about the new aid. “It matters to me what your opinion is about it, Serenity.”
She blew out a breath and shrugged out from under my arm. “I need more alcohol if we’re going to discuss this.”
When she returned from the kitchen, she had two shot glasses of brandy. She handed me one and we clinked them. “Prost,” we said in unison, which meant cheers in German. We tossed the alcohol back, and it burned all the way down my throat. I set the glass down and leaned back on the arm of the couch, motioning for her to speak.
She blew out a breath, and it rustled the locks around her face. “I needed alcohol to help me say these three words. You were right. The fifteen-dollar vibrator was not better than Serenity.”
“Do tell,” I said, grinning.
She rolled her eyes but relaxed into the back of the couch. “Not much to tell. I figured Steely Dan’s vibrator would surely get the job done. I wasn’t going to do anything with them, just to annoy you, but then curiosity took over. You know what they say about curiosity.”
“I do,” I agreed, smiling.
She motioned to her bedroom. “I found the directions for Steely Dan’s and read up on them, then tried it out. The first thing I had to question was why men made vibrators with a point. Comfort was not a word I would use when it came to that thing, but I gritted my teeth out of sheer willpower. I refused to say you were right unless I had no other choice!”
I was working hard not to laugh, but I knew this was not funny to her. I took her hand in mine. “Discomfort is the opposite of what you were supposed to be feeling.”
“No kidding,” she said with obvious sarcasm. “It gets worse. I turned the base of the vibrator to low as the instructions said, and it nearly jolted my head right into the headboard. Once I unpeeled myself from the ceiling, I admitted defeat. I was going to have to admit it was garbage. I got up and tossed it in the trash can where it cracked open and lay there in all its gutted glory.”
“Which is exactly where it belongs,” I agreed, throwing her a wink. “At least you tried.”
“It was an abysmal attempt. I didn’t even want to try Serenity.”
“God, please tell me curiosity got the better of you again.”
“Not without two stiff drinks and two hours of staring at it while pretending to sleep.”
“And when the two hours were up?”
She made the mind-blown motion with her hands. “Never expected what I got. I fell asleep, and this morning when I got up, I used it in the shower.”
“Curiosity again?” I asked, one brow raised.
“Absolutely not. I wanted to feel that way again. It was so—”
“Relaxing?” I asked, and she nodded slowly. I did a fist yank and grabbed her chin, planting a kiss directly on her lips. “Best news I have heard all day. Why the indecision in the beginning?” I took her hand and held it to my chest in search of a connection I had only ever found with her. “I worked hard to make sure it would be comfortable and enjoyable for you.”
“I didn’t want to use it for the reason you just said. You designed it.” I went to open my mouth, and she laid her finger against my lips. “Let me finish. I had to face the idea that you designed something to go inside me and offer me pleasure in such an intimate way. Do you understand what I mean? I don’t know if there is anything more intimate than that.”
“There is, trust me,” I whispered, running my fingertip down her cheek.
She shook her head with determination. “Not in my mind, Lars. In my mind, you creating Serenity for me was like making love to me for hours every day. It was like you knew all the little nuances about my anatomy to make it the most comfortable fit possible. It was like all those patterns and settings you made available were ways you would touch me if we were together. Does that even make sense?”
I sat quietly, holding her hand and gazing into her eyes until I could form a sentence again. The effect she had on me always stole my breath and my ability to put together a sensical thought when we were together. “On an intimacy level, it suddenly does, yes. When you separate the act of lovemaking from the emotions, then it makes complete sense. I have to agree with you. I designed Serenity to be exactly like her namesake, soft in all the right places, but hard when needed. You are the tiniest thing I have ever had the pleasure of knowing, and I wanted to incorporate your size into the equation. I wanted to give you a pleasurable stretch without pain. I hope I accomplished all of that.”
“And then some,” she whispered. “It was scary at first, but then it started to relax me in a way I didn’t know was possible. My reaction tells me Serenity will be a solid performer in the catalog once she’s in production.”
I grasped her chin and brought her lips to mine, where I kissed them softly, leaving them there to linger without making contact until she whined for more. “I cannot tell you how happy it makes me to hear your positive reaction to it. It was my literal wettest dream to know I brought you that kind of pleasure, even if I could not be present.”
She grasped my face with her tiny hand and rested her forehead against mine. “You were present in my mind the whole time. You were present on my lips when the pleasure was too much to hold back. You were present from beginning to end.”
My lips crushed hers, and I moaned, my body and mind at its limit of the imagery it could handle without touching her. I pressed her against the couch, my hands holding her face in mine while I slid my tongue inside her. I hoped she sensed how much I wanted it to be more than my tongue. She shivered instantly to answer my question.
She did.
She sensed it all.
