Page 88 of Iris
Iris
The car moves through the traffic of people and vehicles as Xavier crosses the main street that runs like a vein through most of Sabine City.
We hit alleys and side streets until he’s skirting the edges of where the parks and boardwalk are and as we reach the starts of the Upper Side, the expensive boutiques, the museum and then the houses. I keep my eyes straight ahead.
The ball is a glow in the near distance from the edge of my eye.
I know I fucked up by running off with him and attending the meeting. I fucked up by not insisting I return the moment everyone agreed I’d try to talk to the Monarch.
I should be tied in knots.
But I’m not.
At least, not about that.
The scene in the alley unravels around me and the invasion of Killian’s fingers pushing into me, the cascade of sensations that unleashed…
Oh, wow.
If Xavier hadn’t turned up, would I still be a virgin?
Maybe, but only if Killian hadn’t stopped.
Maybe, if Xavier hadn’t stood there, not moving to take part.
If he had…I don’t know. I honestly don’t know.
Damn it, the wetness between my thighs grows as does the thick, growing urge for more. Is this what slick is? It must be.
I clench my hands as Xavier pulls up in a secluded spot.
Reality tumbles in with it.
If I’m seen with him, alone with him, then I won’t get to see the Monarch.
Everywhere, I remind myself, is secluded in this part of town after hours. But he chooses a spot between the streetlights. So we’re in darkness.
The silence almost rings in my ears.
“Are you mad?” I lick my lips because my brain and emotions don’t want to play by the rules. They want something different. Something more. “At me. At…at me and Killian?”
He doesn’t say anything. Well, of course he doesn’t, but when I look at him, through the swirling awareness that sings against my skin, I know the truth.
And I nod, suddenly anxious he understands what it is I need. What I’ll take.
“I want you, too,” I say. It’s probably the wrong thing to say. Just like not caring about my virginity is the wrong thing, too.
But I don’t.
My family does, and while there have been boys I’ve kissed, I’ve never met one that made my heart leap, or got juices flowing to want to do more.
Except now.
I swallow, unclench my hands. “I want you both. I don’t know how that really works. I’ve seen porn, some, anyway, and while Iget it, I just don’t know if you two do it at the same time or if you take it one at a time?—”
Xavier holds up a hand. Though the blue eyes seem cool, calculating, they’re alive and fiery beneath that layer. The calculating… It’s real but in this case, it’s about my situation, not against me or how he can use me.
I think.
