Page 134 of Iris
“Mom…”
She takes a breath. “Darling, I remember my first heat, so I’ve had things prepared. For all your girls, so that you all would be comfortable while you were here. But…I sent them to you.”
Shit. Guilt stirs. I didn’t think this meant so much to her. “Thanks, I got them, I?—”
“I’m trying not to take it personally. And I get it, I do. But I won’t lie and say it doesn’t hurt.”
I swallow. I move on stiff legs to her, and I hug her from behind. “I’m sorry, Mom. We were out, enjoying the day, and I didn’t realize until…I just thought since Penrith was close and could help…I wasn’t thinking…”
The weight of what I’ve done comes down on me. Crushes.
It’s not the going into heat or having sex or all the rumors about me that has her so upset. It’s the fact that I didn’t even think of her, of how she’d feel. It was an important moment in my life she wanted to help me through, to comfort me and be my mother.
She turns and hugs me back, and in that hug, I feel the truth behind her sadness.
Mom thinks she’s losing me.
And not just to age, but in heart, too.
When she finally releases me, she wipes her eyes.
“I’m being a silly, sentimental lady who wants her girls just to stay girls a little longer. And to be a part of your life in some way during all stages of it.” She sniffs, and a half-hiccupped laugh escapes. “Does that make me selfish?”
“No…I don’t think so. It makes you a good Mom.”
She smiles. “I’m glad you think so.”
I draw in a deep breath and try gently to move on to another subject. Something that may cheer her up.
“Mom, I don’t know if Penrith has told you yet, but while I was over there, we got to talking and she wants to host a ballfor us. We decided on a theme—Midnight Garden. What do you think?”
She puts a hand to her chest, her entire face lighting up with excitement “She didn’t say! Is that true?”
I nod, trying to sound enthusiastic about the whole thing. “I know you and Mari can make it into the event everyone talks about for the rest of the Season.”
“Oh my! There’s so much to do. Catering, decorations, flowers—loads and loads of flowers. Everywhere! We’ll make it into Sabine’s own Garden of Eden. A paradise.”
I chuckle. She looks so much like Rue in her excitement, I can see where she gets it from.
“I have to call Pen straight away.” She whips out her phone and makes the call just as Mari pokes her head in. The sound of violin drifts in, followed by Rue.
Mom leaves the room, chattering excitedly to Pen on the phone.
“Is it true?” Rue asks once Mom’s voice fades away. “Am I going to throw a ball?”
“Not you,” I say. “Mom and Penrith. The Midnight Garden.”
She clasps her hands and twirls. “Our ball. It sounds amazeballs. Did you hear that? Pretty clever! Wait until the QB writes about this. I’ll be famous.”
Rue takes off, and Mari takes my arm. “So we’re doing this?”
“You’redoing this with Mom and Pen.”
She shakes her head. “Nope,we’redoing it. You’re not getting out of this?—”
“Oh, good,” Heath says, striding in. The side of him that Emmie got to see is long gone. “You haven’t run off again.”
“I didn’t run off.”
