Page 46 of In For a Penny
“What about me?” I raise an eyebrow, challenging him.
“You know what. When was the last timeyouwere tested?”
Oh no.
I know I’m an adult, but getting tested isso annoying. I already hate going to doctors, so the thought of having to sit in a waiting room in a doctor’s office I don’t know and then getting checked out is cringy. Also, I’m just plain lazy.
I am winning at this adulting thing, as you can probably tell.
“I don’t need to get tested.”
“Ha. Nice try. You’re getting tested.” Oliver points accusingly at me as I frown.
Oliver gets out of bed—naked—and walks over to his desk. You have to admire someone who evidently gives no fucks about walking around completely bare. I see the number of scratch marks I left all over his back and flash back to a particularly delicious part of our romp. It was a bit hard to control myself sometimes. I needed something to hold on to.
I’m brought back to planet Earth when he opens the last drawer on the bottom of his walnut desk and pulls out a roll of chocolate Digestive cookies. “I mean,” he says as he stuffs a cookie into his mouth, “you can’t be such a hypocrite.”
I laugh internally at this man who tries to pass himself off as an alpha but has a secret stash of McVitie’s chocolate Digestives in his bedroom. I can just imagine him at work in one of his ridiculously tight three-piece suits, trying to look serious with a teacup and chocolate cookies in his hand.
“Agreed, I will get tested. But you can’t just hide cookies from me. Gimme, gimme!” I say, jumping on the bed on my knees and sticking out my hand toward him. He drops a cookie into my hand, and I take a massive bite out of it. I suddenly realize I amravenous.
“Okay, next policy,” I say as he sits back into bed. “No sleeping with anyone else in the program but me.”
“Are you fucking serious?! You can’t do that to me!” He looks appalled.“I was so close to getting with Eloise!”
“First off,” I start, “Eloise hates you, and you know it. Second, I am not asking you to be exclusive here. You can still sleep with whomever you choose; it just has to be outside of the program. I don’t want to have to deal with cattiness or jealousy or whatever.” I take a deep breath. “It would just be too weird. What if the other girl gets all weird and competitive? And if I’m being totally honest—and please don’t read too much into this—I am far too insecurenotto get jealous if you’re not paying attention to me and are trying to hook up with someone else. You know we women are all a little crazy.”
“Some more than others,” he mutters under his breath. “You’re an idiot, you know that? How many times have I told you that you don’t see yourself? But yes, I accept your situational exclusivity policy. On to the next one.”
“Okay, but pass me another Digestive, will you?” I take a bite of the cookie and moan. “God, why is chocolate so fuckinggood?”
Oliver groans, frustrated. “Can you not make that sound? It’s making me want to skip these ‘policies’,” he says with a mocking tone, “and go straight to round two.”
I roll my eyes at him as I chew. “Next policy: no one else can know about this. This is gonna be like Fight Club. We don’t talk about it. No one knows. Our secret.”
He dismisses me with a hand. “What? Is this really such a big deal? It was amazing. Are you going to tell me you wouldn’t want to tell any of your friends?”
I smack him across the head.
“Ugh! Fine! It’s not like anyone would mind, but whatever!”
“Final one. We’ve already talked about this, but absolutely no cuddling or spooning. We have a no cuddling or spooning policy in this deal, got it?”
He rolls his eyes at me for the millionth time this morning.
“Okay, crazy. You’re on.” Oliver smiles broadly and sticks out his hand. I shake it.
“Perfect. Round two, or shall we go out to breakfast?”
“Both.”
