Page 265 of Vicious Saint
I don’t mean to laugh, for so many reasons, Saint’s narrowing eyes being top three.
“You don’t think it’s true?”
More like I don’t thinkhethinks it’s true.
I’m confident, but also aware of things I lack that most guys prefer.
And thosethingswere always present from the girls I know he’s been with.
Okay,fine. I’m being a little insecure.
Sue me.
When seconds pass and I give no answer, he purses his lips. “I’m not reassuring you, Jimi, and you know why.”
I do.
And Saint’s refusal to play a deciding factor in how I see myself is something I’ve learned to really appreciate about him.
We’ve had a few run-ins similar to this, even before getting together, all ending with different versions of “you should know who you are without anyone needing to tell you.”
Truth be told, after years of unsolicited validations from my mother and aunt, it’s refreshing to not have a person jump to defend me against my weight.
“Thanks, Letterman.”
His “you’re welcome” comes in the form of a thoughtless nod, making it easier for me to move on from the moment of weakness.
At least, that’s what I think is about to happen until I catch the wheels in his head start turning.
I’m about to ask Saint what the hell’s got his breath all shaky when he announces, “I’m in love with you, Jimi.”
I blink stupidly, unable to form coherent words.
“I…uh…”
“I know.” He curls his lips into the most gorgeous half smile. “It came as a shock to me too, since you’re such a damn pain in my ass.”
A laugh manages to bubble out of me, but it’s uncomfortable.
Not because I don’t feel the same way, I do, but I assumed Saint would want me to be the first to admit it.
Just like our encounter during junior orientation.
How the hell am I supposed to process a guy, who spent over a year fighting for power between us, pass all of it over to me in the form of five words and a pet name?
They were the mostamazingfive words, though.
Ones I didn’t know how badly I wanted to hear until Saint said them out loud.
As for the pet name, well, it grew on me.
“It’s okay if you don’t feel the same.” He shrugs. “I got a lot of shit to make up for.”
“No…it’s not that.” I shake my head profusely. “You just caught me off guard.”
“Felt like the right moment, you know?”
I mean…is there ever awrongmoment for the most sought out, never-the-type-to-settle-down, beautiful guy in your school to tell you he’s in love with you?
