Page 251 of Vicious Saint
“’Cause I know I won’t be selfish enough to ask again.”
Holy mother of non-apology-apologies…
What are you doing to me?
If there was any doubt left before this of Saint ruining me for anyone else, it’s been dead and buried with those final words.
“Damn it, Letterman,” I whine, shaking him. “You can’t say shit like that when I have to stay mad at you.”
“I know, I know. I fucked up. I should’ve told you why I was scared to have you around Theory.”
With a step back, I admit, “I’d have understood, you know? Wanting it to be easier to keep us safe from your family’s drama.”
This has Saint blinking several times, lost again in thought.
“Did I say something wrong?”
More blinking.
“Saint?”
“Huh?” He finally snaps out of it. “What’d you say?”
“I asked if I said something wrong.”
“No, fuck no.” He shakes his head. “Everything you said is right.”
With intent to lighten the mood, I insert one of his corny jokes.
“Submission, huh? I can get used to this.”
Of course it’s an epic failure, because Saint remains all business as he cups my cheek. “It was me who hurt you first, Jimi.” His statement comes through non-negotiable. “So I promise to never let anyone else hurt you ever again.”
An odd vow, given Saint’s dragging other people into his mistakes. But it’s honest so I’ll take it, then add it to the only end of this conversation I never imagined.
“Are you done?”
“Yeah. I think so.”
“Good.” I drape my arms over his shoulders. “Now kiss me, you idiot.”
Saint’s smile takes up half his face as he walks me backwards into the nearest tree, resting a hand above my head and another under my chin. He stares down at me, eyes not only adoring, but speaking to me with relief.
I use mine to speak too.
On how much I care for him in spite of his transgressions.
Forgive him in spite of my pride.
Maybe even...
The insane thought, along with my breath, gets stripped away by Saint’s lips pressing against mine. Tentative at first, allowing me time to familiarize. By time, I mean maybe two seconds, because once I open for him his fingers are squeezing desperately around the nape of my neck.
Tequila and lingering marijuana from his tongue explodes on mine as we link together, the taste bringing forth a sense of bliss and comfort I never knew existed until now.
It’s dizzying. Electrifying. And when Saint’s tongue withdraws from my mouth a whimper follows him right after.
“Shit, Jimi.” He kisses me hard. “I really missed you.”
