Page 180 of To Free a Soul
A time unknown, but of unwanted burdens
“You don’t seem pleased about this,” Weldir stated, watching his mateveryclosely, who had the sun stone on her person.
He was ready to snatch her back to his realm if she so much as dared to go near Jabez’s castle with it alone. Seated on a tree stump, she stared at the tent belonging to Mayumi, which had been set up under Faunus’ ward. She was waiting to see if Emerie would leave the borrowed tent on her own so she could speak to her privately.
“I’m not,” she grumbled. “I don’t want to ask her to do this.”
“Then why are you? Surely we could find another human to do it.”
Lindiwe lowered her gaze to the stone in her nimble hands as she rested the backs of them in her lap. Her face shifted to appear downtrodden.
“Because I don’t know where to start, or who to ask to do this for us. I’m worried that if we wait too much longer, another one of them will die.”
“Then they die,” he stated, unsure why she just couldn’t seem to understand or accept this. “They will just come to me and start their life here. They would be safe.”
“They’ve only just found brides, Weldir. They’ve onlyjustachieved happiness.” She thumbed the stone. “They all deserve to live a proper life. And what if it’s Faunus? I think something in me would break if I’d have to look after my own grandchildren because their parents died. I... don’t want to do that. I will, if I must – if it comes to that. But it shouldn’t have to be that way.”
Hmm. I never considered the impact on those who have younglings.Or hadn’t yet had the chance to make their own.I... also don’t know what would happen to the bride, should their Mavka die.They would no longer be alive – that’s all he knew.
Lindiwe lifted her gaze to the night sky and let out a defeated expire.
“How did things go so wrong? I feel so awful having to ask this of Emerie, but what if waiting ends in disaster? I know this will likely hurt Ingram, and I know he’s already lost so much, but she isn’t his bride. Hecanfind someone else if we’re unable to bring her back to life.”
“You could always inform them of that potential.”
“And give them false hope, only to find out we’re wrong? That her soul is destroyed upon using it? That seems so much worse. I’d feel like a liar in the worst way. I’d rather not say anything at all and then present them with the hope when it’s a real possibility.”
“I’m unsure of how to ease you,” he admitted, hoping she’d understand that hewantedto, he just didn’t know how. He often said the wrong thing.
She pressed her fists to her forehead, just as a small, soft sob cracked from her.
“Help me feel better about this. That I’m making the right choice – because I don’t know what I’m doing anymore, Weldir.” A glittering droplet fell from her chin and landed upon the skirt of her dress, darkening the white of it. “I feel like I’m becoming a selfish, horrible monster. That something inside me is rotting. The fact that I’m even going to do this, knowing how much it will hurt them both, makes me feel so awful that I don’t know how to swallow it. But I keep thinking about Faunus and Mayumi, and their babies. About Orpheus, who waited so,solong for someone to love him. About Magnar, who wants to greet Fyodor again one day. How desperately they are all trying to survive just another day. Ingram’s future is undetermined; his bride isn’t set in stone. He will live past this, and yet I can’t help thinking how unfair this is on him too. I just... I feel so lost, Weldir.”
“It cannot always be humans that make sacrifices. Our offspring must also help, even if it isn’t always for their betterment.”
He actually had a solution, but he knew it was morbid, and something she would never agree to. If Emerie was destroyed, then Lindiwe could destroy Ingram’s skull herself and let him be with his twin. They could traverse Tenebris together, just as they did on Earth. There would be no difference for them, as all they’d done was adventure and play.
But she doesn’t see Tenebris as a second life for them, like I do.
“I know,” Lindiwe said, wiping the back of her wrists against her cheeks. “It just feels wrong. I wish you’d just let me do this instead.”
The growl that snapped out of him was lethal.
“Oh, be quiet. I know you won’t let me.” She sniffled and lowered her hands to reveal how glossy and swollen her facehad become. “I’m just expressing how I feel. But thank you for listening. For letting me get this out.”
Emerie finally emerged from the tent, and his mate’s expression grew cold as she stood.
“Always, Lindiwe.” As she approached the woman from behind, he added, “I have enough mana right now to produce a portal, perhaps even two. All we can hope is that she agrees, and that her soul isn’t disintegrated in the process.”
“I know,” she whispered.
Then, she grabbed the redheaded woman from behind while covering her mouth so she wouldn’t scream and wake Ingram.
Weldir listened in on their conversation with a heaviness weighing down his mist. He sympathised with his mate, even if he couldn’t relate nor truly understand her pain.
What’s done, is done, and what may come, will come.
All they could do was try... and witness the results thereafter.
