Page 125 of To Free a Soul
Because the answers he sought would only do more damage to both of them. Why deepen his potential mental fondness of her and make him yearn for something that was impossible?
If I’d known I would end up falling in love with you, I never would have given you my soul.
There were many regrets she had in her life, but nothing this horrible, or painful, or made her truly wish she could turn back time and change it.
I wish it wasn’t me you found at the edge of the Veil.It would have been better, and easier, had she just bled out or been eaten.
His tendril squeezed her lightly. There was no malice in it, no cruelty. He was holding on, and she wanted to believe it was because he didn’t want to let her go, fervently,desperately.
And that made her want to change her mind.
Her stomach twisted, but she wanted him to know at least one very important thing. So that he wouldn’t blame himself.
“You did nothing wrong, Weldir,” Lindiwe finally answered, quietly, softly, and with utter sincerity. “You’re right. I do care about you, and you’ve done everything you can to be patient with me – often when I don’t always deserve it. But I don’t want to pretend anymore. I also don’t want to pretend that I’m okay anymore. There are issues that can’t be resolved.”
“Well, yes, but I am content with how things are.”
“I’m not. There are things I want that I can’t have, and wishing on impossibilities will only break me.” She lifted her gaze to greet his, and she crinkled her eyes with swallowing sadness. “I’ve spent three hundred years making sure that doesn’t happen.”
Lindiwe was on the brink of totally losing her humanity.
What would happen if she did?
December 18th, 1972
Lindiwe wiped her brow with her forearm before shielding her eyes from the intense summer sunlight.Ugh. Summers in Austrális are always so humid.She was baking in the heat.
A disgusted cringe marred her face as she beheaded the fruit bat she’d caught. Her scent-cloaking spell worked perfectly to prevent the two little Duskwalkers wandering around her from attacking it.
One of her babies, as she’d had a set of twins, came to investigate the noise she’d made. Little black-feathered wings twitched as they sniffed around, unaware they’d just placed their tiny paw in a growing puddle of scarlet.
“You get the head this time,” Lindiwe told them, since she’d given them the body of a raven last time. “And you can have the body this time,” she continued, as she searched for the second baby Duskwalker.
Her eyes widened, and she made her shadowy dagger disappear as she rushed to her feet. “Oh, for fuck’s sake! Where did you get a lizard from?!”
She couldn’t even tell what kind was dangling from their raven beak, only that they were trying to rip it in half with the tail already missing. She dived for it and grabbed the lizard around the head to yank it away.
A shrill cry came from her right, and Lindiwe snapped her head in the direction of the sound.
“No! You’ve already got wings! You’re supposed to share that with your sibling,” Lindiwe yelled, as her winged child began eating the body of the bat she’d intended to give to the one she was currently tug-of-warring with.
The lizard tore in two, and her arms cartwheeled when she fell to her back. The top half of the carcass spun as it flew through the air... and landed on top of the baby that was in the middle of growing a bat skull while they ate. They immediately turned to the offending assailant and attacked... half a dead lizard.
From her prone spot on the ground, she peered past her feet to where her raven-skulled child grew a lizard tail and feet. Scales reflected purple, blue, and black as they appeared across their flesh.
Her head fell back with a thud, and she shook it. Then she threw her arms into the air and kicked her legs immaturely with a frustrated yell.
“I wanted youbothto have wings! One with a bat skull and raven wings, the other with a raven skull and bat wings.”
She wanted the world to know they’d shared everything they’d eaten in their evolution and had been created at the same time.
Throwing her arm across her face, she sighed and just lay there defeated. It was too late. Now one was part lizard, tail, paws, and all, and the other wasn’t – although she was sure they’d sport some scales here and there.
You know what? This is probably a good thing.Flying Duskwalkers were terrifying things, but she just hadn’t been ableto resist the temptation.Even if it means I can’t fly with them both in the future.
She tsked. Just as she went to sit up, two little creatures climbed on top of her – one up her right arm, and the other up her left leg. When they both made it to the middle of her torso, their skulls clunked together and they snarled at each other.
One tackled the other, and they both fell off her. Trills, growls, and squeaking roars became her background noise as they rolled around in a fighting heap. Neither was about to hurt the other, no matter how they struck with bendy claws and bit into each other’s indestructible bodies.
