Page 32 of War Of Fire and Fortune
I fell to my knees by the river to grab something to drink and splash some water on my face. Sitting back, I tried to catch my breath when wind whipped at me from my right, and Baetos landed with a thud, blocking the suns rays. I looked up at him, and he dropped a fish head into my lap, covered in dragon drool. Gross.
“Listen, you guys might be okay with regurgitated snacks, but I think I’ll pass.”
He cocked his head to the side as if saying,but the head’s your favorite part. You haven’t eaten today, and if you don’t eat something, I’ll eat you.
Did I really get all of that from a single look from a dragon? Yes. Since we weren’t able to communicate outside of Magni Island, I had improvised quite a bit, and most of the time I’d been right when asking him and he would nod in agreement. He huffed a plume of smoke down over me, and the scent of it was oddly comforting and warm.
“Alright, if you bring me a fresh fish, I will eat it before heading to Ace’s tent, okay?” I conceded, and he was in the sky before I could say another word. A few moments passed beforehe was back with a fish still flopping when he dropped it on the shore next to me. I cleaned it, used my bending to cook it, and ate it quickly so Baetos would stop being a mother hen. Once he seemed satisfied, I stood, and he placed his forehead against mine in farewell before getting back to his nightly rounds around the mountains for the rebellion. Since coming here with me, he checked in with me every day. Occasionally, we would go for a ride before Ace returned from Ember, but for the most part, he and Emeris stayed busy together. Part of me wondered if they liked each other. Baetos was an adult now, despite their age difference.
By the time evening descended, I was bone-tired but no closer to finding peace. My footsteps felt heavy as I made my way to Ace. The sight that greeted me stopped me in my tracks: Luana sat slumped in a chair beside him, her face pale and drawn with exhaustion. She must have stayed there all night.
Guilt hit me like a blow to the stomach, twisting and churning as I approached. She gave me a tired smile as I knelt beside Ace. I reached for my bending, calling it forth as my hands hovered over his battered body. The faint glow of my bending lit up the tent, and I focused on each flicker, willing it to bring him back.
"Emelyn." Kade’s voice echoed down our bond, soft but insistent. I’d been keeping him blocked, but being as tired as I was and because I was using even more energy now, he must’ve been able to slip through.
The sound of it made me freeze, my fingers faltering mid-air. His tone was laced with something I couldn’t bear to name—something that tightened the knot in my chest.
“Please, we need to talk—”
“There’s nothing to say,” I snapped aloud. Without hesitation, I slammed my mental barriers back into place, severing the connection, blocking him out. I was so fucking tired.
I forced myself to focus on the patterns of pale light swirling from my hands into Ace’s still form. It was easier than acknowledging the ache Kade’s voice had left behind.
The silence stretched thin around us, but I could feel Kade nearby, hovering just out of sight. The bond was muted, but his presence was impossible to ignore, like the faint hum of static in the air. He wasn’t going to leave, but he wasn’t going to push, either. At least not yet. I knew I couldn’t stay away from him forever.
As the hours dragged on, my power began to falter. The blue glow sputtered and dimmed, and my hands trembled as I tried to hold on. My vision blurred, and the room tilted dangerously, as a wave of dizziness washed over me.
Just as my knees threatened to buckle, Luana’s hand closed over mine. Her touch was firm, grounding me in a way.
“That’s enough,” she said, her voice steady. “You’ve done all you can for today.”
I nodded weakly, too drained to argue. She was right—I knew she was—but the guilt still pressed heavily on my chest. Somehow, I forced myself to my feet, though my legs felt like they might give out at any moment. It had only been a day, but I’d do this for however long it took.
The walk back to my tent was a blur. My exhaustion was so consuming that I barely registered Kade’s presence following me. He didn’t say a word, but his shadows rippled in the corner of my vision, never straying far. Anytime I would slightly stumble, they were there to straighten me, and I was too tired to fight them.
When I finally collapsed onto my cot, I didn’t even bother removing my boots, same as last night. I lay there staring at the ceiling. Turning my head, I saw Kade’s silhouette just beyond the tent flap, his broad shoulders hunched as he sat on the ground.
My chest tightened painfully. I hated him for keeping secrets, for breaking the fragile trust between us. But I hated myself more for how much I missed him.
Hot, angry tears welled in my eyes, spilling down my cheeks as I turned away from the sight of him. I buried my face in the coarse fabric of the cot, wishing the world would just stop spinning for a moment.
He was right there—so close and yet so impossibly far away. And what made it worse was knowing that I wanted him. Even now, after everything. I wanted him so badly.
“You know, I wonder if Willow saw all this when she told me who and what you were to me all those years ago. She only told me the bare minimum, and it was enough for her to know I would do everything in my power to keep you safe. But she never mentioned if you would forgive me once all this was over.”
It would make sense for him to have a relationship with Willow, considering Marlena had told us that her and Willow had been in Ember before Willow had escaped. Kade had probably grown up around her. Had he stopped to watch her send-off not only for my benefit, but for his final goodbye to for a woman that had shaped us into what the future needed? Emotion clogged my throat as Kade continued.
“The only thing she would ever say was that it would work out in the end, that it would be worth it. I want you to know, Emelyn, that she was right because no matter what happens, I will always be here. I’ll always be yours, no matter your decision.”
I held back a sob and curled up on the bed, wrapping myself with my thin blanket. I wasn’t ready to accept his apology. The wounds were still too raw, and the thought of letting him in again terrified me more than anything else.
I clenched my fists, willing the angry tears to stop, but they kept coming, and then darkness flitted around me and I couldfeel him there—well, not him, but his shadows. “Sleep,mei wynsorara.” And then sleep found me.
I tossed and turned until my skin was drenched in sweat from my nightmares. Which was odd because when Kade was around, my nightmares were usually nonexistent.
I peeled myself from my bed. My boots greeted me first, lying next to my bedside along with my leathers. I hadn’t taken them off before falling asleep. Kade must’ve come in here after he helped me drift off. With swift, practiced movements, I donned them both, and I took a deep breath. Maybe I should talk to Kade. A sigh slipped through my lips.
I edged out of my tent, a shroud of darkness still blanketing the world outside. The sun was hiding beyond the horizon, and Kade's bedroll lay empty. That was odd too. The past few days, he hadn’t left my side. And I couldn’t feel him like I normally could. He wasn’t close. My chest tightened with unease. Had something happened?
