Page 5 of Lines Drawn
He takes a deep, shuddering breath and nods. “Back to what I was saying. Il Padrone knew I was torn and he pushed theissue. I had to prove I wouldn’t just work with Ignacio, but that I wouldn’t leave him or our connection behind.”
“Do you want him back?” I ask again.
He shakes his head, even as more tears fall. “I don’t know. I love him. I always will, but everything is so fucked up.Ifucked up. I don’t know how I feel right now. When we were together, I realized I missed him. But I don’t know if I’ve missedhimor the people we used to be.
“I can’t answer your question because I don’t know. But…I would like to have an answer, for us all. Would you hate me if I decided that I did want to give us another chance?”
Reaching for Benjamin’s hand, I pull it from my neck and switch our positions, shoving him against the wall. I can hear Ignacio protest down the hall, but Hollis must intervene because I don’t have Chaos ripping me away from the baby mouse. With his hand in mine, I raise his arm above his head, holding him in place. Benjamin grips my shirt, pulling me closer to him.
“No,” I assure him. “I want you to be happy. You and Roman seem to love the bastard. I will never promise to like him, Topolino. I don’t trust him.”
“Trustme, Ten. Or do you not think I’m capable? Even after you trained me. Are you just like him? Thinking I'm weak?”
The blow is visceral, and I despise the way it makes me feel. The overwhelming crush of loss, even though he’s standing right in front of me. I tighten my grip on his hand, and he winces, though doesn’t complain. Gripping his throat lightly, I tilt his head back.
“I am not him, Topolino. I know you’re strong enough to take care of yourself. You stood up to me, and faced me down when I was at my worst. I will never think you are incapable.”
“Then trust me. I don’t know what’s going to happen between Ignacio and I, but at the very least, he’s my friend. And I need that. Almost as much as I need you.”
Putting pressure on his throat, I hold him against the wall. “Ho bisogno di te più della vita stessa. Ti rispetto e sarò qualsiasi cosa tu abbia bisogno di me.” Leaning down, I kiss him. Drinking down his moan.
“Do I get a hint of what you said?” he asks breathlessly when the kiss breaks.
I grin. “Ask Cristian for lessons, and then tell me yourself. Since it seems we’ll be crashing here for the time being.”
He huffs at my response before saying, “Can I trust you, Ten?”
I know what he’s asking, and it kills me he has to. But, I understand the reasons why. “You can trust me to let you make your own decisions. I won’t coddle you, Topolino, but I will protect you if I can. You can’t fault me for that.”
“I love you,” he whispers. “And I love that you want to protect me. Just respect me, too.”
“I do. Doesn’t mean I’m not going to fuck his cum out of you the first chance I get.”
He blushes and I can’t help myself. Tilting his head back further, I lean down. Releasing his hand, I tug his shirt out of the way and bite into his flesh, directly above the mark Ignacio left. I break the skin, but don’t go as deep as my instincts are telling me to. I’ll mark him again, later. For now, tasting his blood is enough.
“You keep my heart beating, Benjamin. You and Roman, Hollis and Jude. You’re what keeps me human. You have my respect, and I will accept the choices you make. Even if I question your sanity.”
He laughs a little. “Thank you.”
I kiss him, letting him taste his blood on my lips. “Don’t thank me for giving you what you need.”
Pulling back from him, I let him move away from the wall, and he slides an arm around me, holding me close. Pressing akiss to his hair, I meet Ignacio’s eyes, seeing worry and love shining in them as he looks from Benjamin to me.
I stamp down the need to punch him in the face, before making his insides his outsides. Knowing that’s not what Benjamin or Roman need from me. Whatever Ignacio reads in my expression has him nodding once, as if he can sense that I might still want to kill him, but won’t—yet.
He better hope he doesn’t fuck up with Roman, because there are no more chances. And just because I’m standing down for now, doesn’t mean I’ll let him off the hook for the shit he’s done. No matter what Benjamin says, or thinks, or feels, I don’t like the bastard, and can’t respect him. Not yet. Not when I know he hasn’t even talked to Cris about Roman.
Hollis and Jude come back to stand on my other side, and we continue to wait. After a while, Cristian and Carter come down from where they were getting checked out, and probably fussed over by Il Padrone. I have to hold back my sneer when the Martelli Boss follows in Cristian’s wake. That’s another headache I have to deal with, and he's at the top of my shitlist after hearing what he forced Benjamin into.
Soon after Cristian and Carter arrive, the door to the medical suite opens, and Donovan walks out.
“He’s okay,” he signs. “Relatively. It’ll be a long recovery.”
“English, Vonny,” Hollis says. “Ignacio needs to be informed as well.”
“Sorry,” Donovan says. “The noise and the people in there… Doc said I could take a break after this.”
“It’s fine. Would you prefer to sign? We can interpret for Ignacio. You can take your implants off. I’m sorry for overlooking that.”
