Page 93 of Give My Everything
I step into the bathroom and smile at the large soaking tub.
“You’re welcome to use it any time you want,” he says.
I wrinkle my nose.
“I’m not supposed to take baths while I’m pregnant. It’s not good for the baby for me to be in all that hot water.”
“Maybe after, then?” he says, flicking off the light as both of us head back out to the landing and toward the stairs.
After.
There’s this mental divide in my head that seems to be difficult to get past.
I can see myself moving in here. Getting things ready for the baby. Settling in and even coming back here with the baby once it’s born.
But that after part is like a gray fog. I can’t see anything past that—Ben with the baby, me running around chasing a toddler, or any other thing that’s to come in the future.
And I don’t know why.
A few hours later, I’ve stopped by my house for an overnight bag, showered, changed, and I’m preparing to return to Ben’s for a movie, pizza, and sleeping over.
If I’m completely honest, my body is hoping for more sexy times even though my heart and mind aren’t sure we can handle it.
“Remmy.”
My brother’s voice stops me in my tracks.
I turn and look over my shoulder, finding Dominic walking toward me from the kitchen.
“What’s up?” I ask.
I love my oldest brother. I really do, but he acts like a second dad sometimes and it makes me want to, like…kick him in the shin. Which I know isn’t very mature of me.
But Jesus, let me have some damn freedom. It’s why I pushed so hard to move away for college. I couldn’t imagine having my mom and dadandbrother watching my every move.
Dominic eyes the bag in my hand. “Where are you off to?”
I hoist the bag a little higher on my shoulder.
“I’m staying over at Ben’s tonight,” I reply, making sure my shoulders are back and my chin is high. I don’t even let my voice tip up at the end like I’m asking a question.
Because I don’t need anyone’s permission.
Besides, Dom knows I’m already pregnant. It’s not like I can getmorepregnant.
At that thought, I giggle.
He crosses his arms. “If you’re going to continue to bounce around town with him and he’s going to introduce you to his family ashis fiancée”—my heart stops—“you better sit your butt down with mom and dad or they’re gonna hear it from someone else first.”
I swallow, though my throat suddenly feels like sandpaper.
“You’re lucky they’re out of town right now or this kind ofchismemight have gotten back to them.”
Gossip.
My parents have never been the types of people who find it important to stay up on town talk. It wouldn’t be very Catholic of them to spread gossip, so my mom tries to steer clear of it.
But my brother is right.
