Page 127 of Give My Everything
“I might know a guy,” is all he says.
I laugh, remembering my ownI know a guymoment with Remmy just a short while ago.
“You sound like you’re trying to get me a stolen car stereo. What doesI might know a guymean in the medical world?”
He grins but keeps his eyes on Ivy.
“There’s this doctor at the hospital I used to work at in Seattle. He’s been gathering patients for a trial with PNH. There’s a chance Ivy could be a perfect candidate.”
“Are you serious?”
He nods. “They’re testing out using bone marrow from partial matches instead of identical matches. So, parents, siblings, half-siblings and cousins with partially matched marrow—”
“Oh my god,” I whisper. “Logan, we have to get into that trial. Tell me what we need to do and I’ll do it—whatever we have to pay.”
Logan puts a hand on my shoulder. “You don’t have to pay to be a part of a trial. That’s not legal. I’ll call him tomorrow and get more details.”
A sense of urgency is thrumming through my veins.
“Ben, I always encourage patients and their families to hold on to hope, always, but don’t get too hyped up just yet, okay? I don’t want you to rest all your hopes on this just for me to come back to you in a few days saying she isn’t eligible for some reason.”
I grit my teeth but nod in understanding.
“I get it. I do.”
We both stand in silence for a second and watch Ivy sleeping. I don’t give a fuck what Logan says to me about hopes. I will rest all of my hope on anything that could possibly help her.
Even if I’m left devastated at the end.
CHAPTER23
REMMY
“So what you’re saying is that you’ve found an amazing guy, stood up for yourself, and made choices about your future that you’re happy with.”
Josslyn looks at me with an eyebrow raised.
“You make it sound like everything is going wonderfully,” I reply, tucking myself into the pillow I’m holding to my chest. “And it’s not.Clearlyit’s not.”
She scoffs.
“Girl, everything is all about perspective. Trust me on this one. Okay, sure, some of the shit you’re dealing with is heavy.Heavy,” she stresses, drawing out the word. “But that doesn’t mean you can’t see the positives crawling out from among that steaming pile of negative shit.”
I make a face. “What a visual.”
Josslyn laughs, that deep, full-body laugh that first drew me to her in the first place.
I might seem happier now, but I’ve never been a very smiley, laughy kind of person. When I first started college and Josslyn was assigned as my roommate, I thought clearly the administrators had made a mistake.
There was no way her carefree, can-do, ass-shaking attitude was going to be a good match for me. I was in a dark place, and I could feel that Josslyn’s light was going to poke holes in my black balloon of unhappiness and self-doubt.
Luckily, she won me over. I say luckily, but I really mean lucky for me. I still wonder why she wants to be friends with my negative, pessimistic ass, but I don’t ask questions. I just say a thankful prayer that we stumbled upon each other and that she saw something in me that made her want to stick around.
We’re snuggled into bed in one of the upstairs guest rooms. The minute Josslyn and I were alone, she told me it was Snuggles and Struggles Time then led me upstairs.
I’ve spent several hours vomiting up everything that’s been going on over the past few months. We had a lot to catch up on as we haven’t talked since I left for my trip to Colombia in May and she moved to Colorado to use her business degree by helping her sister manage the family weed farm.
I told her about the rape. About the pregnancy. About the breakup with Lucas. About Ben’s insane proposal. About how we’ve been bonding, both emotionally and physically. About what Lucas said to me at the hospital. And about the blowup with my mom today.
