Page 138 of Give My Everything
My brow furrows. “What? No, I don’t want my father’s company. I just wanted—”
“What? What did you want? What was so important that you were willing to exploit my pregnancy to get what you wanted?”
I’m so startled by what she just said that my words get locked in my throat, in my mind, unable to be freed as she spins on her heels and bolts from the room, racing up the stairs.
All I can do is follow in her wake and hope once I get to where she is, she’ll listen.
But when I get to the doorway of my bedroom, my stomach drops at what I find.
“What are you doing?”
“Packing.”
I watch, frozen, as she lifts the clothes she’s placed in my dresser and dumps them in her suitcase in one swoop. Then she heads into the closet, pulling out her dresses and other nice things.
I move in between her and the suitcase, blocking her ability to chuck her last bit of clothing in.
“Move, Ben.”
“Don’t do it, Remmy.”
She tries to move around me, the hangers rattling where they hang in her arms, one or two falling out of their garments and landing on the carpeted floor with a muffled clatter.
“Ben…”
“We’ve talked about this,” I interrupt, knowing if I don’t do everything I can to convince her, she’ll leave. “You’ve told me about how you solve your problems. You avoid. You cut and run because you hate confrontation, because it makes you feel scared and uncomfortable and weak.”
She shakes her head but doesn’t move, just keeping her eyes on the center of my chest.
“Don’t do that this time,” I say. “Don’t give up so easily. Because this, what we have…it’s special. It’s important.”
“Important because you want something from me,” she says, but her voice doesn’t sound as sure anymore.
Shaking my head, I step closer. “That’s not fair—at all. I wouldnever…” I pause, trying to get my words right, feeling like everything I’ve tried to plan and prepare for is falling through my fingers. “Remmy, when this started, I thought we were both just two people in fucked-up situations trying to figure out how to solve our problems. If I’d thought for any reason that we’d be here now, that I’d feel…likethisabout you, I would have done this all differently. I can’t go back and change it, though. All I can do is move forward from here and try to do the best thing I can for you, for the baby…for us.”
“Why?” she says, tears slowly tracking down her face. “Why do you want to do the best for us?”
I step into her and take her face in my hands again, wiping the tears away and wishing I could do more.
“Because I love you,” I say, knowing it’s the only thing I can say to convince her my feelings are genuine and not just based on her last name. This is my Hail Mary, at best, and I have to hope and pray and wish that it will be enough. “I’ve been in love with you. With your wild hair and your obsession with Oreos and the ridiculous way you seem to get paint everywhere on your body even when you’re fully clothed.”
More tears fall, her eyes wide.
“I amlostin you, in this terrifyingly beautiful love. And I would give my everything to follow you deeper into the unknown.”
Her eyes drop to my lips, and I take that as my cue, pressing mine to hers.
I hear a clatter of plastic as she drops the clothes completely, her hands rising and coming around my neck. My hands drop to her hips and I lift her so her legs can wrap around my waist.
“You really love me?” she says, pulling back to look me in the eyes. “You’re not just saying it because…”
“There are plenty of things I might lie to you about,” I say, and her face falls. “Whether or not I like a hat you want to wear. Whether or not your ass is getting bigger because of the pregnancy.”
She gives me a tiny smile when she realizes what I’m saying.
“I might tell you I love the idea of moving or putting a pool in the backyard.”
She giggles, and my heart soars.
