Page 4 of Be Your Anything
The feeling I’d had when I stood on that board for the first time… Even now, nearly twenty years later, it’s a feeling I try to recreate each time I slice through the water. The pure joy, the ability to let go and just be…it was incredible.
The next time my dad came to town, we took our boards out and surfed together.
It was a strange feeling, wanting to make someone proud. I’d never had that before.
Definitely not with my mom, who worked all the time and usually left me with the nanny. I mean, she did the best she could with the hand she was dealt. She’d never really wanted a kid, but when she got pregnant with me, she also didn’t want tonothave me.
So, I lived in limbo.
Technically I had a ‘family’—if you can call my mom and dad that with how rarely I saw her and how infrequent his visits were—but I lived most of my childhood alone.
Well, not alone, I guess.
I always had the waves.
They were there to listen when life got too hard.
“Dude, are you even listening to me?”
I look over to where Otto is floating on a board next to mine and shake my head.
“Sorry, man. Got distracted.”
He rolls his eyes. “I said I’m gonna head in. You coming?”
I nod and wave him on. “Go on ahead. I’ll catch up.”
He throws up a shaka and starts to paddle off, but I only watch him for a few seconds before my eyes drift away from his form and focus on the coastline in the distance.
To the homes that stretch along the ocean’s edge and make up a small portion of the South Bay.
I love this town.
Hermosa Beach has been my home for my entire life.
I’ve been lucky enough to do a lot of traveling, see a lot of places, go on some really amazing adventures—but nothing has ever made me feel the way being here does.
I mean, I understand why people leave. There’s a great big world out there, ready to be explored and loved and shared and lived in, and I like exploring it, too.
In the spring, I was a guest judge at a teen surf competition in Japan that my sponsor sent me to. I did an exhibition, judged the heats, posed for pictures, and signed autographs. The organizers took me out for some delicious food and showed me a few amazing surf spots along the coast of Chiba, the area outside of Tokyo where the competition was held.
Earlier this summer, over Memorial Day weekend, I spent a few days up in Malibu at a smaller, local surfing competition. I volunteered for a bit, competed, and then Otto and I went out to the bars in the evening. We had a good time, and I was able to meet up with my girlfriend for dinner one night while I was in her neck of the woods and our schedules aligned.
Whether I’m in Japan on my own or just a few hours up the coast along the PCH with people I’ve known my whole life, I’m always ready to come home.
Maybe that makes me a pussy, but I don’t really care. I like what I like, and that includes my hometown, the place that feels the most comfortable, the most relaxed, the most familiar.
Though, recently, things have gotten a lot more complicated. The town I know and love is changing, sure. That’s just what happens no matter where you live, and you can roll with the wave, ride it, or let it slam right into you.
Unfortunately, a little wave of my own making has decided to take me on a ride outside of my comfort zone.
My sister Hannah moved in with me at the beginning of the summer. A sweet thing from Phoenix, she left her life behind to try something new. Things were going well—I thought—until she found out I’d been lying to her, withholding a secret that threatened the tentative relationship we’ve been building.
Thankfully, it seems like she’s forgiven me.
Well, maybeforgiveis a strong word. I know she won’t be forgetting what I did—what Wyatt and I did—any time soon, but at least she’s staying.
God, I’m so glad she’s staying.
