Page 109 of The Maxwell Brothers
“Daddy, is Lexi here?”
No, because your father scared her off. Fuck me.
“No, honey. She went home for a bit.” What else could I say? I felt horrible.
“She’ll be back, right?”
“Yes, sweetheart.” As soon as Paisley was eating, I was going to call and apologize. I’d seriously messed this up.
While preparing the batter, I kept a close eye on her. She brought her coloring book to the island, singing one of her favorite soundtracks.
"How are you feeling?" I asked her a few minutes later, putting a waffle with a smiley face and a party hat on it in front of her. That made her smile. I ruffled her hair, standing right next to her. After today’s scare, I didn’t want to be farther away than necessary. I couldn’t.
"I'm okay. Really. I'm so sorry I scared everyone, Dad."
"Hey, don't worry. It’s okay. We all do things we don’t mean to when we’re upset.”
Like me with Lexi. Damn it.
I touched Paisley’s shoulder and pulled her into a half hug. I wanted to keep her safe from everything and everyone. But I didn't get to hold her very long because she pushed me away, looking up at me.
"I'm not a baby anymore. I’ll be ten soon. I understand stuff."
"What do you mean?"
She shrugged, taking a bite of her waffle. "I spoke to Mom, and she said she might take me to Disneyland for my next vacation. I know Mom's life isn't here anymore, so I won’t see her as much. And that's okay. You’re here. And so is Lexi." She put her fork down, looking up at me. She seemed nervous.
"What is it, Paisley?"
"Dad, do you think Lexi would want to be my mom?"
Something twisted in my chest.Shit. I fucked up so badly.I honestly thought the answer to that was a resounding yes, but I'd hurt Lexi, so now I wasn't sure of anything anymore.
I cupped my daughter's cheek. "I think Lexi loves you very much."
"I love her too, Dad. She's the best mom I could hope for."
And that thing in my chest kept twisting, remembering how upset Lexi was when she left here. At that moment, I wasn't in the right headspace, but I should have kept my mouth shut instead of voicing my fears. It wasn't fair to her.
Paisley focused on eating her waffles, clearly happy in her thoughts about Lexi. My mind was racing at one million miles an hour.
The doorbell rang, startling me.
"Oh, that's Grandma Beatrice," Paisley said.
"How do you know?"
"I spoke to her earlier on the phone. That’s why I woke up. She asked if she could come here. She was worried too." My daughter bit her lower lip. "Now she'll see that I’m okay, and she won't worry anymore. And we need to check the list for my birthday party."
"Go on and open the door for her."
She slid down from the chair, leaving the half-eaten waffle on the plate as she darted out of the kitchen.
"You gave us quite the scare, girl," Gran told Paisley seconds after I heard the front door open.
"I know. I'm sorry, Grandma. I promise I won't do it again.”
Both of them came into the kitchen.
