Page 54 of The Duke's Second Bride
“You would not think that if you had seen us together as of late,” Ava muttered.
But Edith shook her head, insistent. “Perhaps, as you said, he is merely trying to be respectful?” she questioned.
Ava sighed. “Perhaps,” she said doubtfully, not quite ready yet to reveal her real reason.
The shame at the thought that he might be disgusted by rumors of her infertility was too much to bear.
“Have you made it known that you would like to live as husband and wife?” Edith asked. Then she paused and arched a brow. “Wouldyou like to live as husband and wife?”
Ava thought of Christian. His height and the breadth of his shoulders as they pressed against the fabric of whatever suit or shirt he wore. She thought of the deep blue of his eyes, and how she could have sworn she had caught them raking up and down her figure.
But unlike when Brandon had done the same, the thought of Christian looking at her like that sent a rush of delicious heat through her, rather than terror or repulsion.
Though she said none of this aloud, the rush of heat to her cheeks made her blush. Edith simply nodded knowingly.
“Of course. That’s no surprise.” Her friend leaned in closer. “He is a rather fine-looking gentleman, after all.”
Ava giggled in spite of herself. “How dare you speak that way about my husband!” she said playfully, spurring a returning laugh from her friend.
“Well, someone ought to!” Edith said. “Now tell me, why don’t you put that poor man out of his misery and tell him that you are his wife and would like to be treated as such?”
Almost immediately, Ava felt herself sober. The question washed over her like a bucket of cold spring water, bringing her back to that terrible night.
With a start, she realized that Edith was still watching her questioningly.
“Well?” Edith asked, not willing to allow her friend to avoid the question so easily.
Ava bit her lower lip. “I did,” she confessed. The shame washed over her, but it was followed by immense relief at no longer having to keep such a dreadful secret to herself. “On our wedding night,” she continued. “We arrived at the country house. After dinner, he had made a comment which led me to believe …”
Edith nodded, listening raptly. “Go on,” she urged Ava.
“Well. I went to ready myself for bed, and he didn’t come. So…” She winced. “I went to his room. And he … he rejected me.”
Already just saying the words felt like someone was trying to pull out her teeth, and Edith’s horrified gasp did not help.
“No!” Edith exclaimed. “How could he? Perhaps you were mistaken?” she suggested. That was just like Edith, always the optimist. “Or perhaps?—”
Ava shook her head, not wanting to let this train of speculation go on any further. “He made it quite clear that he wants nothing more from me than a civil arrangement,” she said primly. “It was rather embarrassing.”
Immediately, Edith softened. “Oh, poor Ava,” she said, and reached out to pat her friend’s gloved hand with a gloved hand of her own. “You need not be embarrassed. If anyone should be embarrassed, it ishe, for wasting the opportunity to be with his young, beautiful new wife.”
Ava chuckled. The jest only barely soothed the sting of the memory, but it still helped.
“Right,” she said, though her tone made it clear she did so disbelievingly.
“And,” Edith added, “I still maintain he might have been trying to be considerate of you.”
Ava snorted. “Considerate!” she exclaimed. “I have never met a less considerate man in my life.”
Even as the words left her mouth, they began to ring false to her. After all, she knew Christian loved his son. He had married her in order to save her from public ruin and from being preyed upon by her horrible brother-in-law. He had allowed Pudding to live with them.
And, of course, she could not help but remember the purchase of the book of plants from the village bookstore. That gesture had played in her head for days after the fact.
But then she recalled all their petty arguments. The last one, in particular, had lit up her ire the most. It was one thing to stand toe-to-toe in argument against her, but to be so callous in dismissing his son’s feelings about his dead mother? Ava could not excuse that.
She shook her head, returning to the present and her conversation with Edith.
“He is stubborn and accustomed to getting his own way,” she said scathingly. “I can’t imagine he would be particularly shy in voicing his wants. And, moreover …” The venom left her tone as she recalled the final reason she believed he didn’t want her.
