Page 85 of Once Bitten, Twice Fried
“What’s the name of the bloke?” Tom repeated, more angrily this time. “Is it… Is it Colin?”
“Jesus Christ, Tom! No, it isn’t Colin. Her name’s Julie and we were in college together.” Zoe knew she was in no position to be disappointed but yet she was. That Tom ever thought that she would’ve been anywhere near Colin!
“Wait, what?” Tom’s eyes widened even more. “Julie? You shagged a woman?” He sat back, the anger gone as quickly as it had appeared. “Huh. Who would’ve thought?” He stared at the wall behind Zoe.
Zoe was extremely annoyed that the fact that she had slept with a woman seemed less terrible than if it had been a man, but she had rehearsed this conversation in her head the entire afternoon. She wasn’t going to get sidetracked.
“Tom, I’m sorry I haven’t been fair to you and I didn’t tell you earlier.” She sighed “What I’m trying to say is that I haven’t been happy in a long time, which is why I let this happen. It’s better if we part ways. I don’t want to hurt you any more than I already did and I don’t think I want the same things in life as you do any more.”
Tom looked at Zoe. He had a faint smile on his face. “I know.”
“You know what?”
“That you haven’t been happy. Of course I know, I live with you.”
Zoe didn’t really know what to answer. This hadn’t been part of the script she’d rehearsed in her head.
“I want you to know that I’m willing to work it out if you want to,” Tom went on. “What relationship doesn’t have ups and downs?”
“Tom, this isn’t a simple down. I cheated on you. For me, it’s a deal-breaker. I can’t be with you knowing that I treated you that way.” Zoe felt tears in her eyes. She tried hard to not let it show and looked down.
She heard a sniffle and looked up again, to see tears rolling down Tom’s face. At that, she lost her composure too, and let out the sob she had been holding back.
“It’s just… I knew you weren’t happy for a long time. I proposed to you because I thought it would make you want to stay with me.” He swallowed. “I love you, Zoe.”
Zoe shook her head. “Tom, you haven’t been around since you proposed. And you only wanted to plan the wedding when I wasn’t available.”
“I know.”
What did that mean? What kind of man proposed and then immediately turned away from his fiancee and his wedding plans?.
It suddenly hit Zoe.
“You don’t want to get married either, do you?”
Tom weakly shook his head.
“I did it all for you.” He smiled at Zoe through his tears. “I didn’t want to lose you. You’re the kind of woman that a man only gets one chance at in a lifetime.”
“Oh, Tom.” Underneath his overconfident facade, there was someone just as scared as her, Zoe realised. If they had gotten married, it would have only gotten worse with Tom’s resentment growing as time went on. She shot him her own teary smile.
“Are you… Are you leaving me for her?” He asked.
“No.” Zoe shook her head. “I’m leaving you for me. What happens next… I don’t know.”
Tom nodded, then put his hands in front of his face and softly wept. Zoe sat next to him and silently cried her own tears, both of them starting to grieve for what they’d had, and what they’d lost.
After a long moment, Tom stood up and rubbed his hand across his face.
“Alright.” He blew out a big breath. “I’ll take the guest room tonight.”
Zoe stood up as well. “Wait.” She moved towards her ex-fiancé, her arms open. Tom looked confused for a second, then accepted her embrace. “I’m so sorry, Tom,” she murmured into his shoulder.
Tom only answered with a deep breath. He squeezed Zoe in his arms before releasing her. “I’m sorry too.”
Tom took a good look at Zoe and smiled. He turned around without a word and headed upstairs. Zoe watched the man she’d said yes to silently disappear. Goodbyes were never easy and she was glad Tom had taken it well. He had probably known it was over long before Zoe had, even if he hadn’t been able to admit it to himself.
He was right, Zoe would only be once in a lifetime with a man like him. But she hoped that she was the type of woman that a woman could have twice in her lifetime.
