Page 82 of Once Bitten, Twice Fried
“That’s not my problem, Harry. I’m not going to wear their wedding dress because there isn’t any wedding!”
“They’rehaute couture! This is one of the best deals I’ve gotten you along the years!” Harry chuckled as if Zoe was insane for saying no to that.
“I don’t care about the deal,” Zoe growled at him. “I told you I would think about moving the wedding date up. I said I would talk to Tom and let you know in a few days. And then I find out,from a tabloid reporter, that my publicist has put out a press release announcing the date ofmy wedding. In two weeks. So that is the problem I want solved, Harry. Figure it out, do whatever you need to do, but when you call me back, I want you to tell me that the deal is off and this whole situation is being handled.” Zoe hung up and wanted to slam her phone on the ground. She had never spoken to Harry that way before. She’dnever spoken to anyone that way before. But she’d never, ever, been angry like this. She felt awful, like a black ball of negativity was festering in her chest.
“How’d it go with Harry?” Nicki yawned from the couch in the living room. She’d spent the past few days at Zoe’s place trying to get her out of this mess.
“As soon as this is all over, he’s fired,” Zoe snapped. “I know he’s done a lot for me, but I can’t do this any more.”
“Agreed.” Nicki let out another yawn. “I still don’t get why he did this.”
“Because he thought he was solving all my problems, and his own too, in one brilliant move. Because he knew Tom would go along with it, leaving me stuck in the middle.” She was furious with Harry, but she was even angrier with how Tom had acted. He’d made all the right noises about how unfair it was that she hadn’t gotten a say, but then he’d taken her hands and earnestly told her that sometimes you needed a little nudge from the universe in the right direction, and maybe that was how they should take this turn of events. She hadn’t admitted to anyone, not Tom, not even Nicki, how deeply that had upset her.
She plopped down on the couch next to her assistant. They hadn’t left the house in days, trying to put out one fire after another, but Zoe’s phone and mailbox were overflowing with offers from vendors. Harry had had the incredible idea of whispering to some people in the industry that Zoe still had to book everything for her dream wedding, and now the entirety of London was trying to sell her something.
Zoe put her head in her hands and tried to focus. “What did we answer to the producers of the show?”
“They really insisted on talking to you about aCooking from A to Zoespecial wedding episode for next season and wanted to get exclusive glimpses into your wedding menu. I told them everything would follow in a press release, but they’re stillhounding me. They say it’s time sensitive because they want it to be the season premiere. .”
“Oh god. They’re really all vultures, the lot of them.”
She sat up and glanced at Nicki, her hair dishevelled and dark circles under her eyes, hunched over a laptop typing polite answers back to a mountain of people. Zoe herself wasn’t looking so great either, she knew. Tom, on the other hand, had looked surprisingly fresh the last time she’d seen him, on his way out to a meeting with studios again for his film project. He’d asked once if Zoe wanted to work on any wedding preparations with him, but she’d turned him down and he had the sense not to push it. Besides, Zoe was certain he was running his own wedding preparations on his side so that everything would be ready for the big day.
She gazed out her big bay window. One of her neighbours was having a barbecue and the smoke was rising above the green wall at the end of her lush yard. How she yearned to be like these people, cooking out and spending time with their friends. To be so oblivious to this nonsensical situation she was in.
Why was she doing any of this?
She didn’t want Harry to get deals with fashion designers for her dress. She didn’t want to buy wedding honey made from an ecological apiary on the rooftop of a London office. She didn’t want the producers of her show to film her wedding. She didn’t want to spend any more minutes having Nicki answering politely to people she had to suck up to.
It felt like her own wedding - her ownlife- was slipping away from her fingers. If only she could’ve gotten married on her own schedule. First of all, she could’ve gotten over her stupid tryst with Julie. She could’ve told Tom about it and worked it out together. She could’ve gone and picked her own dress with her mum. Not that she ever gave much thought about her wedding dress, but at least it was better than having Harry pick it forher. She could’ve also chosen her caterers. There was that small team that she worked with for a wedding last year, based just outside of London. She would’ve also had more time to work on the wedding invites. While she was at it, she would’ve preferred it not to be at Tom’s family’s countryside estate.
And most of all.
She could be marrying someone other than Tom.
The thought seemed to vibrate and glow in her exhausted mind, the only thing she was suddenly sure of. She didn’t want to wake up next to him every morning. She didn’t want to spend the rest of eternity with Tom. She wasn’t ready to spend her life in a media circus and worry about publicity and be stressed out all the time, not for him.
Before she could stop herself, Zoe started speaking. “Nicki, why are we doing this?”
Nicki stopped typing, looked up from her keyboard then blinked at Zoe. “We’re doing what we’re always doing, we’re managing your life.”
Zoe stared back at Nicki. She glanced at the laptop. “Put the laptop away. Let’s take a minute here, shall we?”
Her assistant nodded and closed the laptop before putting it on the coffee table. Nicki leaned back into the couch, still looking at Zoe.
“We’ve just been putting out fires that other people have been starting in the past few days, but what’s the point?”
“The point is your career, Zoe.” Nicki had a confused smile on her face. She shook her head.
“But we could be doing more interesting things. I barely cook any more, I feel like I’m running a PR agency for myself. I’m supposed to be a chef dedicated to my craft. But instead, I’m a B-list celebrity with reality TV contestants emailing me to be at my wedding. Where did it all go wrong?”
Nicki nodded, staring at the void. She seemed to also wonder the same thing.
“Nicki…” She started before drawing a long breath. “I don’t want to marry Tom.” Tears immediately filled her eyes.
“Oh, Zoe. I get why you’re stressed about all this work stuff, and the PR and the show. You’re right that it feels a bit, well, pointless right now. But that’s just work, isn’t it? Tom is separate from all that. Maybe we can delay until this mess is sorted and you feel more ready?”
“No.” Zoe shook her head. “They’re not separate, not really. I don’t think they ever can be. And even - ” she faltered and swallowed back her tears. “Even if they could, I still wouldn’t want to marry Tom, ever.” Nicki looked at her for a moment, her eyes full of compassion and concern.
