Page 15 of Once Bitten, Twice Fried
Zoe rubbed her forehead with her hand. She had no idea if what she was about to say was a good idea, but in her state, she decided to take the chance otherwise she’d never have the courage to talk about it again.
“It’s Julie. My ex-best friend. I haven’t seen her in so long, but we had such a strong bond. After we kissed that night, I had considered, you know, dating women. And then… I never got around to it.”
“Ah yes. The same thing happened to me, but with men. I’ve never gotten around to dating them.” Nicki chuckled.
“I’m serious, Nicki,” Zoe pouted. “I’ve never told anyone about this.”
“Do you think you were in love with her?”
“I don’t know.” Zoe drank her glass of water. How could she not know something like that? It’s not as if she thought it wasimpossible for her to be attracted to women. Zoe grew up with friends and family members of all sexual orientations, it was never an issue. Yet, here she was. “I just know that I’ve never really met anyone else quite like her. And that the thought of seeing her again has made me restless for the past weeks.”
Nicki rubbed her neck. “I don’t really know how to answer you. Maybe you were in love with your friend. Maybe not. Human feelings are complicated.” She put a hand on Zoe’s leg. “Can I be honest with you?”
“Please be.”
“I think you’re very worked up about your wedding with Tom, which is quite normal. I think you had a very strong friendship with Julie - that’s her name, right?”
Zoe nodded.
“You had a very strong friendship with her and it ended badly. I’m no therapist, but would there be a chance that your brain is conflating both events? You’re worried about your relationship with Tom and at the same time, you’re happy to finally maybe get closure with your long lost friend.” Nicki paused. “That doesn’t mean you’re definitely not into women or anything, if you feel it’s something you need to explore then any more. But in my opinion you might be questioning your sexuality because you’re questioning your upcoming wedding. Does that make sense?”
Zoe nodded again.
Another silence filled the room.
“Do you think my wedding is a bad idea?”
“I think drinking a whole bottle of champagne by yourself is a bad idea.” Nicki grinned. “Weddings are hard to organise. Tom’s fine. For the times I’ve met him, he seemed very nice. You guys look happy together.”
“We do, don’t we?”
Nicki gently patted Zoe’s leg. “That’s enough processing for tonight. We should both get some sleep. How’s your head?”
“It’s feeling much better. You’re right, I should sleep. You can take the guest room. Just make yourself home.”
Nicki stood up from the bed. “I will. Good night, Zoe.” She walked towards the door.
“Nicki?”
“Yes?”
“Thank you for everything.”
“It’s my pleasure, Zoe.”
* * *
Zoe awoke with the sunlight shining directly in her face. She’d forgotten to close her curtains before passing out last night. Flashes of her late-night conversation with Nicki streamed through her mind, and she squirmed with embarrassment. Why had she talked about all this with Nicki? The poor girl was not paid enough to deal with this. Zoe made a note to give her a raise as well as a long vacation. She rubbed her eyes and tried to recall what else had happened the night before. She had drunk way too much champagne in front of the film crew. Hopefully, she didn’t do or say anything shameful in front of them. That Nicki knew so many things about her was more than enough.
As embarrassed as she was, though, her talk with Nicki was making things clearer in her mind - now that she was sobering up. Still, it was hard for Zoe not to wonder about Julie all the time. What was Julie’s job? Where did she live? Did she finally manage to ever arrive anywhere on time? The last thought put a smile on Zoe’s face. Julie couldn’t be on time to save her life. Zoe used to trick her by giving her a meeting time that was 30 minutes before she herself planned on showing up. Julie had been so outraged when she found out that she started showingup 30 minutes late, out of spite. Zoe would bump the meeting time to an hour in advance, then when Julie also found out about that trick, she bumped it up to one hour and a half and so on. Eventually, it got so out of hand that they’d give each other times that were four hours before the actual meeting time.
A knock on the door resonated in the bedroom.
“Zoe? Are you awake?”
“Yes I am. You can come in.”
Nicki poked her head in. “Just checking if you’re alright, then I’ll head home. I’m assuming, you don’t want to do any work today.”
