Page 48 of Finding Her
“Sure.” My body felt depleted. Between the freezing and the night terrors, I desperately needed to replenish my stores.
As I ate and reluctantly responded to their small talk, I found myself in a vortex of conflicting emotions. Despite all the red flags, I wanted desperately to be by Graysen’s side. I knew his behavior was sometimes questionable, suspicious at best. But, “suspicious” didn’t always mean “malintent”. As I weighed basic survival instincts with faith, I realized I may have to choose one or the other. I didn’t trust myself to make the right choice. Not that I had many options until I could get more settled into society.
“Have you spoken with Theo about my job?” I asked, staring down at my plate.
“Not yet, my dear. The bar isn’t open yet.” Graysen failed to hide the exasperation in his voice despite his tone’s kindness.
“What made you want to work at the pub?” Mykie asked from the kitchen. I blinked twice, not believing what I was seeing. She was pouring herself a drink. I fought the urge to eye the clock in response. Clearly, Mykie was unaffected by standard societal drinking schedules.
“I just want work, I guess.”
“Well, we’re going to be seeing a lot of each other,” she said humorlessly, raising her glass in my direction. The glass pressed to her lips, and she drank.
Graysen
Ten Days Later
I sat in front of the living room fireplace, periodically flicking new flames into its blaze to regulate my emotions. Nearby, Mykie dangled a leg off the couch lazily and stared at the ceiling, her long, sleek black ponytail dangling over the armrest. Faeryn was upstairs having some downtime in the bathroom. She regularly took over an hour to soak in privacy; the watermusthave turned cold halfway through. I hated her being cold when I could so easily keep her warm. Regardless, she usually returned from her baths in a better mood. Not that that was saying much since recently.
Faeryn had been tense since overhearing Mykie and I arguing, and who could blame her? It had to be jarring, especially following our fights over that damned room and her desire to work. I’d been naïve to think I could carry this burden without it affecting her. But there was nothing I could do about it; the alternative was allowing her to share a load that would be potentially crushing. I wouldn’t risk her well-being.
Mykie had been nothing if not supportive. I owed her more than I could ever repay. She had been combative, hostile, accusatory, and snarky with me—all for Faeryn’s benefit. It wasexactly what I wanted. I knew my temper had been nasty for several years, and she was continually testing it to ensure I was thinking clearly about the situation. Having a friend challenge me on topics so sensitive was infuriating, but there needed to be someone checking me.
“She should have more social engagement,” I mused, snapping my finger against my palm to soothe the nettling itch of heat crackling beneath the surface.
We had been discussing how to improve Faeryn’s quality of life for an hour with minimal progress. A heavy mist of discarded hypotheticals hung in the air. She would be out of the bath any moment now, and a decision needed to be reached. Her discontent pained me. Not to mention, having her unhappy in the home could prove dangerous. I couldn’t have her trying to leave, or even worse, return to “Earth”.
“Like the pub?” Mykie sounded tired of my unproductive ramblings.
“The pub isn’t enough.” No matter how pure my intentions, they always returned to orchestrating her life. I despised how controlling it felt, but there wasn’t another choice. “She needs people who aren’t connected to me.” I could growl at the thought of sharing her with the unknown, but knew it was true. If I remained the center of her days, she would grow to hate me, and that would be catastrophic.
“You don’t trust anyone else with her, Gray,” Mykie grumbled, a hand covering her eyes in irritation.
She was right, but my feelings weren’t the priority. “Is there anyoneyouwould trust with her?” I felt nauseous asking, but I had to. This wasn’t about me. And Mykie had proven herself to be as dedicated to the cause as I was.
Clearly caught off guard, Mykie turned her head to look at me with raised brows and blinking lashes. “That’s a loaded question.”
“You’re in the business of secrets, no? Surely, some of your peers respect discretion.” Most importantly, they would be neutral if not sympathetic with our situation, should something slip. Certainly more so than the average pub patron.
Her lips pursed in thought. “Yeah. I have some people in mind who would be safe for her.” Her eyes bore into mine. “Safe, Graysen. Not necessarily pleasant, nor palatable, nor polite. Butsafe.” Each word she spoke was slow, deliberate. She was making sure it sunk in. It was unnecessary; I never missed a single word related to Faeryn. Safe was all that mattered; the rest could be addressed as needed.
I knew the kind of people Mykie associated with. They all performed the same work and as a result were weighed down by similar demons. Their rough edges cut the same. Although not the ideal company for my Little Fae, if she spent some time around them, she would feel more independent from me. It may help.
The sound of a door opening alerted me that Faeryn was done with her solitude, followed by the wood floor creaking ever closer, until she joined us in the living room. I nodded my reluctant approval of our discussion to Mykie. She crinkled her pointed nose in response. We had finally settled on a plan, and it was time to execute.
“I feel much better,” Faeryn stated as she slumped into the nearby chair. Her hair became charcoal when it was freshly wet, forming distinct curls which would fall into waves as it dried.
Mykie stood. “I was just about to head out, but wanted to catch you before I left. Maybe you’d like to join me for a small get-together in a few days?” Her eyes skeptically glinted in mydirection, as if I might retract my consent. I wouldn’t. I thought about it, but I wouldn’t.
Faeryn’s expression shone with intrigue. I was grateful to see the suggestion had caught her interest as much as I’d hoped. “Are you coming, Graysen?”
I swallowed the desire to jump at the invitation. “I don’t enjoy groups, but you should go.”
Mykie may have to tie me up to keep me away.
She grinned at Mykie. “Thanks for thinking of me. I’d love to join.”
“Cool. I’ll keep you posted.”
