Page 10 of Jacked
I don’t want Slater to feel that way.
I fucking hated that shit all my life. Little by little, I figured out all the subtle ways to keep from beingthatguy, but it never feels like enough. The anxious, guilty feeling that one wrong move could tear the mask off permanently is always there. The fucked up part is that I don’t think I even know what’s under there. I’m not sure Iwantto know.
“I always… um—” I clear my throat gruffly. “—kind of liked the sound of a dude moaning in porn and shit.” I mumble the confession with my back turned to him. My heart pounds and my hands shake a little as I dump the lentils into the rice cooker. Shit, why did I say that? He’s going to think I’m telling him I’m into dudes now or something.
“Fuck yeah,” he says almost instantly, no hint of hesitation or shame in his voice this time.
I let out a relieved breath.
“It’s just hot to know they’re actually enjoying it, right?” I glance over my shoulder to see him bobbing his head in agreement.
“For sure. I can’t get off to videos where there’s no emotion at all, when it’s obvious that they’re both just there for a paycheck and every second of it is totally forced. I actually—” He stops himself abruptly.
What was he going to say? He actually what?
Fuck, I’m curious.
I press the button to start the rice cooker and then turn around, facing him as I lean against the counter. The back of his neck is flushed red like he’s embarrassed again. He’s moved on from the vegetables to cutting up the chicken breast. He might not know how to cook, but his chopping skills seem just fine, so at least he’s not starting from complete zero. I can work with that.
He shifts his stance, scooping everything into the pan I set out. With his back to me like this, I can’t help but notice the way his shorts cling to the curve of his ass. Butch was right earlier, whatever areas Slater could use more work on, his ass definitely isn’t lacking. And I mean that in the most hetero way possible. I’m a trainer, I notice this shit.
“Actually?” I say when it doesn’t seem like he’s going to keep talking. Maybe I should let it go, but seriously, what the fuck was he going to say?
He looks over his shoulder at me and wrinkles his nose. “I don’t know if I should say it. Like, I feel like we’re bro bonding and everything right now and I was about to blurt out this porn thing I’ve been into lately and… yeah… figured that might be a little weird.”
I raise an eyebrow and my gut heats a few degrees. I know I’m the one who brought the topic up, but talking about porn is reminding me that I haven’t gotten laid in two months. That quick jerk-off session didn’t do nearly enough to take the edge off either.
“If bros can’t talk about porn, whatcanwe talk about?” I joke, hoping I sound casual and not weirdly energized like I am all of a sudden.
He snorts. “Alright, well, have you ever done No Nut November?”
That startles a laugh out of me. I don’t know why, but that isn’t where I was expecting him to go with this.
“No. I think I’d be the crankiest bastard alive if I was walking around with full balls for a whole month.” I reach between my legs to cup my nuts sympathetically at the thought of going thirty days without busting one out.
“Fair enough.” He chuckles. He finally turns around too, mirroring my posture by leaning against the center island facing me, bracing his hands behind him. The soft bulge in the front of his shorts is more noticeable than it was before. He licks his lips and then keeps talking. “Seriously, no judging, okay?”
I hold my hands up in a show of surrender. The longer he hedges, the more curious I am about what exactly he’s dancing around and what it has to do with the trend of edging yourself for a whole month once a year.
He swallows and his Adam’s apple bobs.
“Before my ex and I called it off, the sex had dried up for about a year. It was to the point that I was sick and tired of my own damn hand, but I’m not a cheater and I wasn’t ready to throw in the towel, so I decided to try to go a whole month without… you know… just to see if I could do it.” He shifts on his feet again and presses his hand over his now obviously hardening dick.
The talk of porn and sex and getting off has my body reacting the same way, my cock tingling and my nipples getting stiff and achy.
I grunt and nod so he knows I’m listening.
“Long story short, I got really into edging. Busting a quick nut once a day is all well and good, but saving it up for a week or two then really taking your time, pushing right to the edge and then holding back…” He bites his lip, and I actuallyseehis cock jerk in his shorts.
My mouth is dry as sandpaper, and the flutter of my tank top against my skin is suddenly enough to give me goose bumps.
“So,” he goes on, “I found this porn channel where it’s like an edging game. There’s a meter on the screen and you follow the prompts and try to hold off all the way until the end. There’s a guy in the videos, but I look at it like a competition, not like I’m, you know, getting off to a guy jacking it.” Slater gives a tight laugh, and I want to reassure him that I get it, but every ounce of my energy is focused on keeping my breathing even and not reading too much into the throbbing of my cock, so I just nod.
“Anyway.” He clears his throat. “That’s it.”
He gives me a shy smile and I swallow through my suddenly dry throat.
“That’s… cool.” We stare at each other for a second before Slater bursts out with a booming laugh. “What? I don’t know what I’m supposed to say when someone tells me what they jerk off to,” I say with a wheezy laugh of my own.
