Page 4 of Guarded Hearts
“I don’t know…” I couldn’t hold out much longer. My breathing was labored with the strain of remaining in check. She was so wet and our rhythm so painfully sensual, my release lurked around the edges of my consciousness. I wanted it, and I wanted to hold off.
“So close,” she murmured. “Please, Pasha.”
My name on her lips almost caused me to lose it, but I caught myself at the last second. Her hands framed my face and brought my lips to hers, a soft whimpering noise escaping her and entering my mouth. It was the sweetest sound I’d ever heard.
“Yes,” she said over and over. “So fucking good.” She pulsed around me. “I’m good. I’m so good.”
I changed my grip on her ass and picked up my pace, chasing my own release. When it came, I collapsed on top of her. As soon as the last of my orgasm subsided, reason returned.
“Protection,” I muttered into her neck. I’d forgotten. How had I forgotten? I’d never, ever forgotten before.
“Not to worry,” she said, wiggling underneath me. “You’re safe with me.”
I raised myself off her and grabbed a nearby box of tissues. I sat on the edge of the couch while she cleaned herself up and straightened her clothes.
She had a boyfriend, didn’t she? When I asked, she avoided answering.
What had I done?
“I’m on the pill, and I get checked regularly for all that other stuff. I know you don’t sleep around—girls on the tour talk—so I’m not worried about where you’ve been.”
She moved around the room, tidying our bottles, while I sat somewhat stunned.
“That was fun,” she said.
I squinted at her as I tried to adjust my clothes. “Boyfriend?”
She pursed her lips. “We broke up. Not exactly something I wanna talk about, either, before or after having sex with you.”
At least I hadn’t broken one of my moral rules along with my two work rules. I couldn’t decide if the night had been a disaster or a triumph. Now that I’d been with her, seen her like that, felt her wrapped around me, I wasn’t sure I could stop myself from wanting it all again.
“I should get back to the bus,” Alyssa said.
“I’ll take you.” I rose from my seat, finally pulling myself together.
“You can’t drive.”
“Mia gave me a car and a driver tonight.” Had what just happened with Alyssa been what she’d meant about blowing off some steam?
Alyssa eyed me, appearing to search for something in my expression. “Of course she did.”
I didn’t know what her comment meant, but my head was too muddled by her proximity and the alcohol to dig into it.
We managed to exit the club unnoticed, and the ride back to the buses was silent. The streetlights washed across her face at regular intervals. Was I supposed to say something? Did she want more from me?
When I climbed out of the car, the door to Mia’s bus swished open, and she came running out, her long dark hair flying, excitement splashed across her face as Alyssa exited behind me.
Mia’s smile faltered, and her gaze narrowed on Alyssa. “Have fun?” she asked, and I recognized the false brightness in her tone.
“Yes,” I said. Alyssa gave me a tight smile and hurried toward her own bus.
“What’s going on there?” Mia asked once Alyssa was out of earshot.
“Nothing,” I said, which felt like a truth and a lie. I wanted to follow Alyssa, figure out if I could seek her out again or if she didn’t want anything more.
Mia flashed her left hand, something bright catching the streetlight. Tyler pounded down the bus stairs behind her, appearing at her shoulder. “We’re getting married!” Mia cried.
I rocked back on my heels in surprise. I wasn’t shocked. Both of them had confessed their questions about whether marriage was the right choice for them. Tyler had worried about Mia being too young to make such a permanent commitment. She worried he’d never ask because she’d abandoned Tyler and her baby once.
