Page 63 of A Cinderella to Redeem the Earl
The trouble was, he would be right.
Her heart squeezed. Misery rose in her throat in a hot prickling sensation. Why could she not follow the rules of her upbringing and behave like a lady?
These past few weeks she had begun to feel at home. As if she had found the place she belonged, where she was respected and valued. Now he would never look at her the same way again.
She wished she hadn’t spoken.
Damian gazed down at her, his expression dark, his eyes unreadable.
She swallowed. Would he now demand she leave?
‘I am sure you were not the first engaged couple to anticipate their wedding vows,’ he said. ‘You were both young. You had no reason to expect that you would not marry.’
The kindness in his voice had emotion welling in her throat, hot and burning. She swallowed down the lump and forced a smile. ‘It is kind of you to say so.’
He tipped up her chin and fleetingly kissed her lips. ‘You are quite lovely, Pamela. Any man would be tempted.’
Her heart picked up speed. It wasn’t the first time he had looked at her with such intensity. Usually, right before they kissed. The attraction between them had been obvious from the start, no matter how they had tried to ignore or deny it.
Since coming to this house, she had realised how lonely she had been in her quest for independence. When Damian was at Rake Hall, she did not feel alone. She felt at home.
When he left, she did not stop thinking about him. Wondering what he was doing, who he was with. Though she tried to pretend she did not care, the thought that he might be with a woman hurt terribly.
‘Are you tempted, Damian?’ she asked, emboldened by the heat in his gaze and by her own rising passion.
‘Constantly,’ he said, his voice a little rough.
‘And yet you resist.’
‘It is not honourable for a gentleman to importune a servant.’
‘I am no longer a servant. We are partners. Equals. Perhaps we should stop dancing around each other and enjoy each other instead.’
Oh. Had she really said what had been in her mind for so long? It seemed where he was concerned she had no control at all.
A shadow passed through his gaze. As if he found her words disturbing.
‘You think I am too bold.’ She shook her head. ‘There I go. Making the same mistakes again, as I did with Alan.’
‘Your fiancé?’
‘Yes.’
‘Your boldness is captivating, my dear. But for all that, you are a lady—’
She pressed a finger to his lips. ‘No. I can never again make such a claim. And to be honest, I have felt so alone with my secret. And now I have burdened you, too.’
‘Alone and lonely.’ He spoke as if he understood the feeling. ‘You miss the companionship of a friend and a lover. Someone with whom you can share your innermost thoughts.’
‘You do understand. Do you have such a person in your life?’
She winced and wished she could call back the words. If he answered yes, she was not sure what she would do. Probably cry.
‘I have not known such companionship. As yet, I have been too busy to think of such things.’
‘You have Monsieur Philippe.’
‘Yes. I have my friend, Pip. He is the very best of fellows.’ He gave her a look of deep sympathy. ‘But you have no such friend in your life.’
