Page 26 of Secrets of the Marriage Bed
Relief filled her. She had wondered how she might raise that very issue. Doctors were expensive and she was not sure he would appreciate spending the coin. But then he was nothing like her first husband, begrudging every penny. She had to remember that. She lifted her brows at him over her cup. ‘You are very dictatorial, husband.’
‘Someone needs to take you in hand,’ he said, his voice strangely gruff as if he found the words uncomfortable. ‘It might as well be me.’
And if not him, who else would? The loneliness she had tried to ignore since leaving her home eight years ago threatened to overwhelm her. If she had not been barren, she would have had a child by now. Children. In that event, she would not have had to worry about loneliness.
A knock on the door heralded the appearance of another tray. While one footman whisked the tea tray away, the second replaced it with the other, bearing a plate of sandwiches and little cakes and a steaming bowl of clear soup. They left as soundlessly as they had arrived.
Julia put a hand on her stomach. ‘To tell the truth, I do feel a little peckish.’
‘But you did not send down for food.’
‘I did not think of it until now.’ Oh, dear, she was sounding defensive. Argumentative. ‘I thank you for your thoughtfulness.’
His grey eyes warmed, as if her thanks pleased him. ‘Good.’ He removed the plate of sandwiches, balanced the tray with the soup on her lap and handed her the spoon. ‘Now eat.’
A smile tugged at her lips. Clearly her husband, while his bedside manner left much to be desired, was trying his best to be sympathetic in the practical way of a man solving problems. ‘Thank you, Your Grace,’ she said meekly.
A twinkle appeared in his eyes. Was there really amusement there? ‘I see what you are about, madam. Do not think I will be fooled by your cozening ways.’ He picked up a sandwich and took a bite.
He had lovely white teeth and his face, though very masculine, was also quite beautiful when that little smile curved his lips. It made him look devastatingly handsome. Her insides fluttered as she recalled their one night of lovemaking. He had smiled then, too.
Apparently, given the direction of her thoughts, she was indeed feeling better. She sipped at her broth. Delicious. Seasoned to perfection. She finished it in short order. ‘My compliments to your chef.’
‘Cook. And she was quite perturbed at your lack of appetite.’
Or was it he who was perturbed? The idea that he cared was a warm sensation around her heart.
He inspected the three remaining sandwiches on the plate resting on the arm of his chair, held there by one large, but elegant hand. ‘Do you think you could manage one of these? There is ham, roast beef, or breast of chicken.’ He gave her the most bashfully boyish smile she had ever seen.
He looked so young, almost hopeful.
It seemed he had saved her one of each kind so she would have a choice, rather than leaving what he least preferred. ‘Chicken, please.’
Looking thoroughly pleased, he passed it over and watched while she ate, as if to make sure she did not tuck it into the chair cushion when he wasn’t looking, like a recalcitrant child.
Protective.
If he had children, that is how he would be with them, too. Longing stole into her heart to be swiftly followed by the ache of regret. The expectation she might give him children was practically nil. When he realised this was the case, would he also hate her, the way her first husband had? What of his promises then? His disappointment?
The warm glow dissipated. She finished the sandwich.
‘Another,’ he asked.
‘No, thank you.’ Thinking of children had stolen the rest of her appetite.
He regarded her intently. ‘I will not have you fading away to nothing.’
‘No, Your Grace.’
‘Humph.’ He paused, looking at her almost expectantly. When she didn’t respond, a crease appeared in his forehead. ‘I told Grindle you would greet the staff when you feel better. I was going to suggest you take to your bed for the rest of the afternoon, but then I wondered if you wouldn’t prefer to take a walk. Get some fresh air. Put some colour in your cheeks.’
Instantly, her spirits lifted. ‘I would love to go for a walk.’
His face brightened. ‘Excellent. Let us send for that dresser of yours.’
‘I think I can manage to wrap myself in a shawl and put on a bonnet,’ she said, not liking the idea of Robins’s fussing.
‘I am sure you can. With my help.’
