Page 24 of Begrudgingly Yours
I shake my head. “Again, you don’t have to apologize. It is what it is. Maybe one day I’ll feel comfortable letting it out, but for now, I’m fine with it.”
She nods, her features still blatant with sympathy. “Well, we both do this to escape our normal lives, don’t we? So why don’t we go ahead and step into our characters?”
I feel relief at her suggestion. Not only because it’s true in every sense, but because she understands. It’s another reminder, yet again, that she’smine. I just have to be brave enough to reach out and accept it.
THIRTEEN
There’s nothing better than a night in, especially one with your eclectic roommate that starts celebrating Halloween two months early.
For the past month, our house has been one big cottagecore display mixed with haunted house elements. My acclaimed movie posters are still plastered all over the wall, but everything else has a touch of Opal in it. Pumpkin-scented candles, decorative autumn leaves, fake cobwebs. There’s even one of those trickster candy bowls with the skeleton hand that grabs you when you reach for a Reese’s Cup. I’ve gotten my hand stuck in it one too many times recently.
I’m definitely not complaining, though. Halloween is my favorite holiday, and now that it’s almost October, it’s officially time for spooky movies of all sorts. Opal informed me that she’s not the biggest horror buff, but that she’ll try anything once. Although, she’s specifically asked me not to playThe Terrifier.
Instead, we’re watching a cult classic, and as Bette Midler finishesI Put a Spell on You, my voice is hoarse and in need of some much needed water.
“So, what’s up with the cute beta that was over today?” Opal asks and I almost choke on my water.
I peer over at her to see she’s already looking at me, looking smug as she eats popcorn from the pumpkin shaped bowl in her lap.
“Oh, you know. He’s the Romeo to my Juliet, so we were just running lines.” I shrug. “Also, he’s not a beta. He’s an alpha.”
Opal smirks. “You didn’t deny that he’s cute, though.”
I flip her the finger and steal a piece of popcorn.
“He didn’t leave any smell behind. He must be on blockers, too,” she says. “I’m thinking about going off of mine.”
My head whips toward her. After that awful blind date Cindy set her up on, Opal decided to go on scent blockers. She wouldn’t say much, but the guy apparently said some weird things about her scent and it made her feel vulnerable. The blockers are definitely effective, too. There isn’t a single hint of her lychee scent in this house.
The fact that she’s thinking about going off of them and letting her scent back out is huge.
“That’s wonderful, Opal! Why the change?” I ask.
She shrugs, but there isn’t anything light about it. “I just don’t fully feel like myself. And I have to get over what happened sooner or later. I don’t want to hide behind blockers forever.”
I give her a proud smile. “Are you nervous?”
“Kind of,” she responds, finally letting out a grin. “It was nice to be invisible for a while. Betas really just walk around without anyone knowing their emotions or if they’re horny. What a freaking dream.”
I let out an embarrassing laugh, because it’s true. “It’s difficult, having everything on display all thetime. I was a beta until I was eighteen, it took forever to get used to my new scent and how it changes.”
“I agree, but I miss my scent. It might sound weird, but it was like a beacon even to myself. I was never confused by how I was feeling, I just followed my own scent to understand myself. That sounds odd, but it’s true.”
I scrunch my brows in a bit, because I’m not sure I relate. At times, it feels like my omega and I are at odds. I’ve never noticed that other omegas don’t separate themselves from their designation. Is she trying to say what her omega feels is whatshefeels?
Instead of going down that rabbit hole, I divert the conversation. “I’m just glad you’re putting those awful dates behind you. You deserve to be fully yourself,allthe time.”
“Yeah…” She trails off and sets the bowl of popcorn on the coffee table. There’s nervousness seeping into her features. I’ve seen it there before, when she told us that she wasn’t going to date anymore.
“Opal, is everything okay?” I ask.
She looks at me, gnawing on her bottom lip. When she speaks, her tone is hesitant. “There’s something I have to tell you.”
I nod, waiting for her to continue.
“I have a scent match.”
The world stops for a second or two, then her words hit me.
