Page 60 of The Fix
“I wasn’t. I knew what I was doing.” He’d had the upper hand when he’d caused the distraction in the trees. He’d had cover while the manwith the gun did not. He’d thought he could get him to expend all his ammunition, and he had.
He just hadn’t banked on the guy having extra in his pocket.
If Cyrus hadn’t thrown the dirt in his face ...
But he wasn’t going to play that game. They were all okay. Cyrus was safe.
Cami stepped toward him again, and he stilled as she slowly went up on her tippy-toes. “Thank you,” she whispered, and then she leaned in, her lips so close to his, their breath mingling.
Oh God, he wanted her. Maybe he’d never stopped. And that likelihood made him feel scared and vulnerable, not like the man he was but back to the boy he’d been. The one who’d been insecure. The one who’d been so deeply aware of all he lacked. He and Cami werebothdifferent now, he knew that logically, but his longing for her felt familiar and outside all rationality. And his impulse was to fight it because he’d been hurt badly by it once before.
Rex turned his head on an expelled breath and stepped away. “You’re welcome,” he said. Cami rocked a little unsteadily as she came down on her feet. She turned to watch him as he moved by her, and then followed him with a sigh.
His heart thumped dully. He wanted her, but not because she thought he’d earned it by acting the hero. And perhaps not a day like today, where emotions were high but would likely crash with the dawning of a new day.
They walked slowly toward the hall where the bedrooms were, tension thick in the air. She stopped at the room where she’d put her things and paused with her hand on the knob. “Get some rest,” he finally said, and he wondered if she could hear the longing in his voice, how deeply conflicted he was. “It’s been a long day, and you’ve got to be exhausted.”
She nodded uncertainly, and then, with a brief glance over her shoulder, she went inside the room and closed the door softly behind her.
Chapter Thirty-Six
Cami spotted the police down the hall when they arrived at the hospital midmorning the next day. She saw Rex glance at her from her peripheral vision as they moved toward Detective Mauro and the uniformed officer and felt comforted by his concern. She wondered momentarily if he realized he did that—constantly and briefly evaluated her mental and emotional state. And she also wondered if that came from pure concern, or from the fact that he knew she’d been through a harrowing event once before. Was he unknowingly expecting her to fall apart at any moment? Or was it simply his way to care for her?
Either way, it was kind, and her appreciation for him grew by the day.
She also realized her gratitude caused him to doubt her overarching intentions toward him. But frankly, she was a little foggy on her intentions, too, so Rex had probably been wise to reject her advances the night before, even if it’d stung. Even if later, she’d lain in bed clutching her pillow to keep herself from going down the hall and knocking on his door. But for what? He’d already made it clear he preferred to keep their relationship platonic. Whether that was for now, or forever, she couldn’t think too much about, not only because it made her crazy but also because she had enough on her plate as it was.
“Detective Mauro,” Rex said, reaching out his hand. They shook, and then Cami did, too, as she greeted the man with a nod.
The detective inclined his head, and they turned and followed him a little way down the hall so their voices couldn’t be overheard from within Cyrus’s guarded room. There’d been a police car outside their rental all night, too, which had made her breathe easier.
“I was able to get some more information on Cyrus’s adoptive parents and the accident that killed them.”
Cami braced, and she wasn’t sure exactly why. Maybe because the couple that she’d only once seen a photo of, and then pictured in misty renderings over the years, was about to come into sharp focus. “The whole family was in the car when the accident occurred. Cyrus’s adoptive father, Gray Sanders, was driving. He was a disabled veteran who was injured in an IED explosion in the Middle East, and though he had a vehicle adapted to his injury, that didn’t seem to be a factor.”
She felt a jolt of confusion. “A disability? Was he injured before Cyrus’s adoption?”
“Yes. He’d suffered PTSD in the wake of his deployment but sought therapy. There’s no indication of a relapse. He held a steady job and, by all accounts, was a well-liked and respected man in the community.”
“The adoption agency, who did a thorough background check, should have known about his mental health struggles,” Rex said.
“Correct. It’s not always immediate grounds for disqualification, depending on the circumstances, but it should have been disclosed.”
Cami blew out a breath. “Because it speaks to future risk.” And perhaps even something that would have changed her mind. Regardless of what her own decision might have been, she knew for sure her father would have encouraged her to pass on the Sanders family. Why risk her infant with someone who may or may not be 100 percent stable, when there were so many other couples looking to adopt? Her dad had worked in the justice system—he was up close and personal with the way mental health crises ravaged families.
“They should have. I would think there’s a lawsuit there, if you choose to go that route,” the detective said.
She nodded distractedly. Maybe she’d think about that later. Although, how would that help in her specific case? The agency wasn’t even in business anymore, and the Sanderses were gone. She didn’t know Mr. Sanders or why he’d withheld the information of his injury, but she remembered his photo, remembered his steady gaze and the way she’d felt somehow ... comforted when she’d looked at him. Mrs. Sanders had appeared kind and nurturing as well, but it was that steady gaze that had made up her mind to choose them to parent her baby.
She felt a shiver of grief on Cyrus’s behalf, followed by a pinch of fear. God, Cyrus was doubly lucky to be alive. In recent years, he’d walked away from a deadly car accident and a kidnapping. Her main concern was the emotional damage he’d suffered, both from those traumatic events and also from the terrible loss he’d suffered. And forevermore, she’d have to grapple with the fact that it was her fault. Perhaps she’d chosen wrongly. Even if his parents had been good to him, perhaps if she’d kept him herself, his young life wouldn’t have been filled with so much adversity. A do-over indeed. Only that was impossible. She didn’t get to go back. She didn’t get to know what outcome would have served him better.
“So no foul play at all then?” Rex asked. “With the accident?”
“None that the investigators found. It appeared to be weather related. A truck hydroplaned on ice and hit their car head-on. The driver wasn’t charged. He did everything he could to avoid their vehicle.”
“God, poor Cyrus,” Cami murmured. He must have been so scared. So helpless. A little boy sitting in the car’s back seat as a truck barreled toward them. The picture she conjured was terrifying, even in her imagination, and she’d have given anything to be placed back there with him, to do something. To protect him any way she was able.
“The good news is that the kid is resilient,” Detective Mauro said. “He’s got all the nurses charmed and is kicking butt with a chess set he requested from the gift shop.”
