Page 68 of Cinder
“I don’t want the best.” Lorenz breathed, grabbing Cin by the wrist and holding on, holding tight through Cin’s next thrust, and the one after, as he kept talking. “I want your worst. I want you to keep—just keep—until I come apart.” He seemed to be doing just that, his fingers curling and his neck arching. “Don’t let me walk back into that ballroom,” he pleaded. “Make me yours.”
So Cin did. He focused only on the ragged speed of his thrusts, bucking into Lorenz like he was trying to widen the space between his love’s legs permanently. Lorenz screamed and writhed, but between his pointed sobs were mumbled sounds ofyesandpleaseandoh God, until he was tense and shaking, and Cin was shaking with him.
Each pressure into Lorenz sent a fresh rush through Cin, growing until not even the moments he took to draw back would let his body rest. As they began to overlap, his wetness contracted in bursts of ecstasy, turning his motions even moreerratic and forceful. He pushed through them, biting his lower lip while a white hot burn of need grew steadily between his legs.
Lorenz seized so suddenly it caught Cin off guard, this scream different from his others as his body went stiff and his cock emptied in a splatter of white. The sudden tightening pressed Cin’s magical fuck-piece against him harder, its vibration writhing through him. A shock of bliss followed it, starting from his sweet spot and rolling through his pelvis, settling deep in his ass as every muscle between pulsed in pleasure. He seemed suspended there for so long that he thought he’d break apart, his consciousness sliding into a heavenly state.
Then, suddenly, the rush subsided.
Cin pulled back with a gasp, slumping against Lorenz’s hips, barely holding himself up with one hand. His worn nether regions twitched and thrummed as he slowly pulled Lorenz’s magical fuck-piece out of himself. He set it to the side, and leaned against Lorenz.
They were both still breathing hard, and Lorenz was staring at him, so many emotions tight across his face that Cin could somehow see them all, yet distinguish none. So gently that it felt more like a breeze than a touch, Lorenz ran his thumb across Cin’s cheek.
“My dove,” he whispered.
Cin stared back. Something wet and terrible slid across his vision, and he didn’t know why. He tried to smile through it, and it just pushed free a single tear. “Yes, Ren?”
“Thank you,” he said, softly, smiling back at Cin through shining eyes. “For more than the pleasure, I mean. Thank you for seeing me, for listening, for staying with me regardless of whether I can keep you, whether I can love—” He drew in a sob, looking away.
Cin cupped the side of his face and a single tear to match Cin’s own spilled out. Before Cin could comfort him though, Lorenz kept speaking.
“You are so very perfect. How— How are you everything I could ever want and I still can’t—” He cut himself off in a hiss, and his fingers flew to the metal exposed in his chest.
Magic sparked through the air.
Hope seemed to collide with Cin’s heart like the impact of a hammer, taking the breath out of him. He watched, more desperate than he had been in all the needy, lustful minutes before. In his head, he begged—the magic, God, Lorenz—please, let it work, let this have been enough.
Lorenz pulled at the bonds jutting from his skin, heaving with each breath. Tears streamed down his face. But the metal didn’t budge. With each frantic failure, the ragged edges of it cut into Lorenz’s fingers, leaving bloody smears across his hands.
Cin’s heart caught. He rushed to stop Lorenz’s tugging, shushing gently. Between Lorenz’s sobs, the spark of magic still hung in the air though. Waiting. Anticipating.
“Please,” Cin whispered, and wrapped his own fingers through the bonds.
The metal pinched his skin as he pulled. He felt something move and, bracing himself, he tugged harder.
Lorenz cried out in pain and he grabbed at Cin’s wrists. “Stop!”
Blood trickled from around the sides of the bonds.
Cin sniffled, then sobbed. He let Lorenz scoop up his fingers, squeezing tightly as they both cried, forehead to forehead until it seemed that all the love in the world had to be soaked in salt.
Twenty-Eight
The cage still bound Lorenz’s heart. Cin felt as though the world had dropped out from under him a second time. It was not as though all hope had been lost—there were no rules to the magic that had been inflicted on Lorenz, no reason to believe that their intimacy would give either of them the strength to remove it. But there had been magic in the air…
Cin didn’t think he’d imagined that.
As he and Lorenz walked through the halls of the castle, their clothes fit snugly back into place, he wasn’t so sure. What Cin did know though, was that the ache in hisheartwas real. That deep, fierce pressure that told him he could—he would—do anything for Lorenz, if it would keep his prince safe, make him happy. It felt so good and true and right, that every time Cin looked back at the ways he felt for his family, he cringed inside.
Emma, perhaps, he did love—even if that love was a bit distorted at the moment—but as for the rest? What were they to Cin, really? After all their years of cornering him into being theperson who was most useful for their needs, he could not dream of a reality where losing them broke him the way Alwin’s loss had broken Lorenz.
And Emma…
Cin’s heart caught, but he pushed himself through the ache with a long breath. She’d shown that she cared more for keeping in their family’s good graces than for reciprocating Cin’s lifetime of affection when he needed it most. And perhaps that was not her fault—she’d grown up with these people who cared as little for her as they did for Cin—but it was still her choice. If Cin had to return to that house, where she avoided him and the rest of his family saw him only for the pieces of himself they could use, could he truly force himself to keep living through that?
There was a better future out there waiting for him, he was certain of it.
Such a revelation should have hit harder, burned brighter, but instead it was a tiny anxious ache in his gut. Lorenz’s fingertips brushed his, and Cin’s stomach fluttered. Whatever Lorenz’s fears for his caged heart, he was still the one thing on Cin’s horizon that he truly wanted. He just had to hope Lorenz could understand that.
