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Blood Exchange Program, but Sexy This Time.

HotMouth

N. O.

LordOfTheWin

Queer Men’s Biting Club.

HotMouth

That’s definitely already a thing, it just doesn’t mean what you think it means.

LordOfTheWin

What, like I’ve never bitten any men before?

I’ve bitten many a man in my day, I’ll have you know.

Three entire men, actually! And two women, and one person who was only kind of a woman. (Her words; she was exactly the right amount of whatever genders she was, but we had totally different tastes in ice cream cake so it would never have worked out.)

HotMouth

Two questions.

One:

Is the biting here an analogy?

And two:

If you ever want to bitemejust say the word.But he couldn’t bring himself to type it, not to Wesley, not sitting in a library, not when there were so many ways that could go so wrong. Even if he had, Vincent was fairly certain Wes wouldn’t get it. The man made weird sexual references like it was a second language and seemed to assume that anyone else flirting was just doing the same. It was the only thing about Wes that frustrated Vincent, mostly because he wanted tolegitimatelyflirt with Wesley, instead of doing… whatever this was.

HotMouth

And two, I think I’m going to have to report you to the vampiric imposteration council.

LordOfTheWin

Imposteration isn’t a word!

And that wasn’t a question.

Also if you must know, it’s only kind of an analogy. Congrats on the inside scoop to my sex life. You are now ranked beside Kendall on the list of people who could successfully blackmail me.

Vincent wanted to laugh, and to cry, and to point out that he already knew on a pretty intimate level what exact phrases and grips would make Wes’s pants tent fastest, so that had probably already qualified him. Instead he sent an evil smirking imp emoji and a gif of a little creepy looking man rubbing his hands together ominously.

LordOfTheWin

Okay I spilled my beans where are yours.

HotMouth

In my pants.

LordOfTheWin

Oh look who’s getting good at this!