Page 27 of Free Heart
He groans. “Fuck, my leg hurts. It hurts so bad my other injuries don’t even register. Like I keep forgetting my knuckles are busted until I do something that makes them sting, but my leg? I never forget it.”
I let out a slow breath, stroking Julio, who’s come over to investigate why I’m on the floor.
“Yes, I’ll let it be a lesson. I’ll be even more careful in the future. I know, and I love you too. I wasn’t lying in those humiliating texts.”
I smile, scratching behind Julio’s ears. I didn’t think he was lying in his drugged-up texts to me either, which means he reallybelieves all those over-the-top things. Maybe he even wants to marry me.
I let myself imagine what that might be like—a wedding to Dan McBride.
He’d probably want to do it on top of El Cap, and he’d free solo the Free Rider route, climb over the lip, and then meet me at the end of an aisle of chairs set up just for the ceremony. I almost laugh at that vision because, honestly, it’s something he’d do. And I don’t hate it. Even though I should. Even though it should scare me to pieces now after what we’ve both been through.
But I loveDan, and if he wanted to get married in a snug little church, and get a good job, and adopt a passel of kids and kittens, he just wouldn’t behim. I can’t imagine a wedding to Dan that’s typical in any way. I figure some aspect of it will have to be terrifying.
But that’s life with Dan, isn’t it? Terrifying as hell.
“Alright. Yeah. I love you too. That’s the last time I’m saying it, though, so I hope you listened.”
I shake my head.
“Yeah, it’s late there, I know. Goodnight. Yeah. Bye.”
I wait a few seconds and then I rise, coming around the doorway and into the room. The bedroom is lit with a few lamps. Julio follows me in and leaps onto the sickbed, but he doesn’t do more than twitch his nose at Dan’s cast before flopping down bonelessly about a foot and a half away from him.
Dan doesn’t meet my eyes. He’s staring at the phone in his hands, and he looks lost. The bruises, stitches, and chipped teeth don’t help.
“Alright,” I say, as if I’m not a little lost myself. “Let’s get you ready for bed.”
“Thanks, Doc. I’d like that.”
Dan’s voice is that of a scared little kid. My heart tugs, and I want to keep him safe forever. So, I take charge for now.
CHAPTER THIRTY
Dan
“What are youdoing?” I ask, watching Sejin type away on his phone with his thumbs.
“Making a list.” He flashes the screen my way. I see the words shower stool, toilet chair, wheelchair—with a question mark following it—and non-slip mats.
“You really think we’ll need all that?” Embarrassment falls over me. Do I need aids to shower or take a shit like I’m some kind of old man instead of a world class athlete? “I’m sure I can handle it without all that stuff.”
“I’m sure youcan’t,” he says with finality, so I don’t even bother trying to challenge him.
“I wish I had a better idea of the timeline for everything,” Sejin says, sitting on the edge of the bed and sighing. “They dumped you out the door before I could get much more out of them than ‘Call this number; they can help you.’ And when I call that number, they say they need information from the hospital about your plan of care, and…”
“Doc, it’s all right. We have time.”
Sejin blows out a long breath. “Thank God.”
Yeah, thank whatever powers that be. We have time.
Sejin rises then and puts his hair up in a ponytail, his expression all business. “Let’s get it done. You need to sleep.”
Sejin gives me a sponge bath, making me feel about eighty years old. I always heard sponge baths were sexy, but this one is far from enjoyable. But I suspect this aspect of my life isn’t going to be pleasant for some time.
I’d be okay with someone just popping my leg off and replacing it with a working one. I don’t know why science hasn’t made that possible yet.
Sejin gets me into a t-shirt and a pair of cut-off sweatpants, coerces me to eat some yogurt and a few pieces of apple, and afterwards holds a bowl of water under my chin for me to brush my teeth.
