Page 24 of Fake Dating Daxton Hawk
Amabella uses the phone camera to apply lipstick. “That’s messed up. What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know.” I claw at my scalp, stressed out of my mind. “I have to tell her I’m Steel, but I don’t know how to do that without ruining our relationship.”
“Okay. Calm down. We just need to find a way to fix this.”
“How the fuck am I meant to fix this?” A group of people pass my table, giving me strange looks when they hear me swearing into my phone. I slide out of my booth and head to the smoking section out on the balcony.
Amabella scolds me as soon as I arrive and place a cigarette between my lips. “Don’t smoke that! You’re going to get cancer and die on me.”
I ignore her words and flick my lighter with the hand that isn’t holding up my phone, cussing when the strong ocean winds kill the flame. Annoyed, I throw the cigarette over the balcony.
“Great, now you’re littering. Just another reason to give up smoking.”
“Amabella, please, give it a rest.” I pace back and forth on the balcony. “You know what Jordan said to me last night on Secret Santa? She wants to meet me. She said she thinks she might love me.”
Amabella’s mouth lifts into a smile. “How did you reply?”
“I panicked and didn’t say anything. I didn’t want to keep talking to her as Steel. It would have felt deceptive. Then this morning I was vague and said I had to leave town.”
“Looking at it that way, I think you did the right thing. You need to cut ties with Jordan on Secret Santa. Don’t reply to her again. You can’t continue talking to her as Steel now that you know who she is. If she finds out, she’ll feel betrayed. The next thing you need to do is tell her you’re Steel. Tell her as soon as you see her again.”
I shake my head, my chest aching with fear that I’ll frighten Jordan away. “The truth will ruin everything. I keep thinking about Felicity and how much it hurt to lose her. I can’t lose Jordan. The pain will be unbearable.”
“You can’t lie to her. The truth is the only way forward. She may hate you for a while, but she’ll come around.”
“Shereallydoesn’t like me as Daxton.”
Amabella clicks her tongue, leaning back on her couch. “What’s your plan, then?”
“I don’t know. Find out what her issue is with me then re-evaluate. See if I can rectify the situation before telling her I’m Steel. That way, I have a chance at keeping her.”
“How can you have no idea what you’ve done to offend her?”
“Trust me, I’ve been up all night thinking about this. The only conclusion I’ve made is that maybe she hates me because I introduced her to escorting.” Visuals of Jordan prostituting herself return to my mind, boiling my blood with self-loathing. My pacing on the balcony speeds up. “I amsucha piece of shit. The confident way Jordan presents herself as Delphine made me believe she was in control of escorting. I was selfish when I approached her at Club Noir, thinking of no one but myself.”
“Stop with the negative talk.” Amabella’s scolding returns. “You’re not a piece of shit. You’re the best person I know. You saved your family from your father. You saved me and Ally from my ex and have given us a safe home. I will never stop being grateful for everything you do for us.”
I groan and rest my forearms on the balcony railing, meeting Amabella’s eyes on my screen. “Doesn’t mean I’m a good man. What I’ve done to Jordan erases all the good I’ve done for other people.”
An alarm goes off on Amabella’s phone. She stands from the couch and grabs her handbag. “That’s my alarm to leave for work. I’m sorry to leave the conversation like this, but here’s what you’re going to do. When do you return to New York next?”
“Not for a while. Two weeks.”
“Can you rearrange your schedule to get here sometime this week?” she asks.
“Work is busy. Maybe I can manage an overnight trip on Friday. But I have to be back in LA the next day.”
“Perfect. Ask Jordan to have dinner with you on Friday. I’ll make a reservation at the hotel restaurant. While you two are sharing a nice meal, find out why she doesn’t like you. Hopefully there’s a quick fix to the problem, you tell her you’re Steel, then bam, you two are all lovey-dovey and happy together.”
“Let’s hope it’s as simple as that.” My head hangs between my shoulders in defeat and I sigh. “Fuck. Okay. Friday night.”
ChapterTwelve
Jordan
“It feels kind of odd that we’re using this random guy’s hot tub,” Mina says, stepping down into the water and finding a seat on Zac’s lap.
He kisses her cheek and slides his arms around her waist. I have massive regrets inviting them to Daxton’s. I’m not usually one to be bitter over other peoples’ happiness, especially not Mina and Zac’s, but seeing them together makes me think about Steel and I’m instantly miserable. That’s a feeling I never thought Steel could invoke, but three days have passed since saying the L word to him and that I want us to meet, and he’s gone completely silent on me.
