Page 46 of Fighting Conviction
“What?”
“I’da’ve peed my pants, probably fallen to my death, forgotten I even had my phone… I don’t know. Somethin’ hella stupid, that’s for sure. But nope. Your head was on straight and you kept it together to call for help.” Virginia shook her head. “I know I wouldn’t’ve done that. I’da’ve screamed bloody murder and that guy would’ve shot my ass before I got around to using logic.”
Ellie rubbed her hand against her forehead and chuckled. “Okay, but that doesn’t absolve me of being stupid.”
Virginia lifted a shoulder and continued on. “Eh, maybe not. But don’t be too hard on yourself. You’re allowed to make mistakes and you did a hell of a job savin’ yourself in my opinion.”
“Virginia.” She was now certain the blonde hadn’t been listening. “Devsaved me.”
Virginia shook her head. “He couldn’t’ve done it without you, though. Besides, sometimes savin’ yourself is all about findin’ the right person to do the rescuin’.”
Relaxing against the couch pillows, Ellie pursed her lips. “Huh… I guess that’s one way to look at it.”
Virginia shrugged as if she hadn’t completely changed Ellie’s perspective with one flippant explanation. “All I’m sayin’ is give yourself grace, girl. You ain’t perfect and it’s no fun tryna be, ya know?”
A small smile stretched her lips. “This is nice, you know. Just… I don’t know. Being normal? Talking with my roommate.”
Virginia snorted. “Bless your heart, girl. It’s darlin’ you think bein’ nearly shot to death in a tree thanks to a traitorous nasty-ass sour cream donut is dadgum normal.”
Ellie barked out a laugh at Virginia’s phrasing of Ellie’s traumatic night.
“Traitorous donut? Sour cream is the best damn flavor and no one can convince me otherwise.”
Well, Sasha, she does have a point. It didn’t need to leap to my death.
Remembering she had a real-life, in-person friend in front of her, Ellie stopped talking to Sasha and rolled her eyes at Virginia. “You get what I mean.”
Round cheeks framing a grin beamed back at her. “Yeah, I do. It’s nice havin’ my roomie.”
“I like her, you know. This is good for you, girl.”
Ellie sniffed at the thought and played with a frayed thread in her sock. “My best friend… Sasha. From before…”
“She’s the one…” Virginia’s soft eyes were understanding when Ellie dipped her chin in confirmation. “If you ever wanna talk about her, Ellie, I’m here. I talk a shit ton, but I’ll totally listen.”
Ellie continued her nod and wiped away at the mist threatening her eyes before letting out a chuckle. “You’re just like her, you know? Kind. Driven. You love people. Sasha was like that. She always said yes to everything. I was the scaredy-cat all the time. I never would’ve done anything if it weren’t for her.”
Warm manicured fingers wrapped around hers over her foot and squeezed. “Well,” Virginia cleared her throat. “I think that’s one hell of a compliment.”
Ellie smiled wider and swallowed back her fear, deciding to finally be honest with her. “That’s why it’s been hard for me. To be friends with you. You remind me so much of her. It—” She blew a heavy breath out, imagining all her reservations flowing out with it. “It… h-hurts.”
The hand covering hers squeezed again and Ellie finally looked up to see Virginia’s eyes welling up with tears and sympathy.
Not pity. There’s a difference.
Pity is lonely. People use it as a shield to reassure themselves the problems in someone else’s life would never happen to them. The sufferer must’ve done something to deserve the karmic retribution they received and the pitying person inherently thinks of themselves as better than the pitiful one.
But when someone has sympathy, they’re sharing in the pain, taking any of the burden they can, realizing it could’ve happened to anyone, and believing it definitely shouldn’t have happened to the person suffering.
Pity wounds the ego, but sympathy heals the soul.
Virginia freed a watery sigh and Ellie felt her pain mirrored back to her.
“I’m sorry for everything you went through. I… I wish I knew what to say. But you are loved, you know. Sasha’s gone. But people who love and adore you are still here. I’d love to be friends with you, whenever you’re able. No pressure.”
The last words were rushed out but Ellie hadn’t needed them. She gave Virginia a small smile in return.
“I’m getting there, V. I’m getting there.”
