Page 161 of I Dreamt That You Loved Me
“Yeah. I was sitting on your lap that day, too.” She brushed her fingers over my forehead and gave me a sweet smile. “That was the day you told me you loved me.”
I brought her hand to my mouth and kissed her palm then guided it to my chest and pressed it over my heart. “It’s still true.” I placed my hand over hers to keep it there so she could feel my heart beating. “Notloved. Love. Present tense. I still love you, Cleo.”
“Don’t say that,” she said sharply.
“Why not? It’s true.”
She shook her head and released a breath. “You barely know me. I’ve only been here for eleven days.”
I laughed. “So what? What does time have to do with anything?”
“You’re high on weed and I don’t want you to say something you don’t mean.” She yanked her hand away, climbed out of my lap, and walked away.
I scowled at her retreating back.
I wasn’t high and I’d meant it. I knew I loved her. I wasin lovewith her.
But try telling Cleo that when she was already gone.
I lit a cigarette and wrote lyrics on the night sky so I wouldn’t lose them. Even Cleo’s rejection inspired my music. She was a muse for the ages. How had I even functioned without her?
I was still writing lyrics on the sky with the cherry glow of my cigarette when Cleo tossed a notebook and pen on the table then walked away again.
“It’s almost like you know me,” I called after her.
Come back.
Come back.
Come back.
She did not, in fact, come back. Stubborn, like me.
There was not a single doubt in my mind that we belonged together, but I had a song to write so I retreated to the studio while the party carried on without me.
CHAPTER SIXTY-THREE
Cleo
Thankfully,the party hadn’t been an all-night affair. By two o’clock, the Rogues and the women were chauffeured to a house in East Hampton and shockingly, I slept like a baby despite Gabriel’s declaration of love, which I wasn’t sure I believed.
I should have still been angry about that whole condom debacle, but no, I’d fallen right into his lap and stayed. Being with Gabriel still felt like home and I wanted to believe that he really meant the words, but I thought he’d tossed them out too carelessly.
Love wasn’t lust. It wasn’t just a feeling.
Love was an action. A verb. An intention. A deliberate choice to show up and do the work.
I brushed my teeth and put my toothbrush in the holder next to his and then did a half-assed job of following all the steps of the skincare regime Annika insisted was necessary when you’re pushing thirty. Ah yes, now I looked dewy and glowing.
I walked out of the bathroom just as Gabriel’s bedroom door opened, and Eddie stumbled out. I heard a groggy female voice calling his name. “Be right back, babe.”
He’d probably forgotten her name. Eddie was a shameless hussy.
“Uh, what are you doing?” I asked, keeping my eyes focused on his face. I’d been on a tour bus with these guys, so it wasn’t the first time I ever saw Eddie in boxer briefs, but I really didn’t want to seethatfirst thing in the morning.
“Using the bathroom.” He might as well have tackedDuhonto the end of the sentence.
“No. I mean, in Gabriel’s bed.” I flapped my hand toward the open door.
