Page 99 of Wilder Love
“Got it.” Without a second thought, I held my breath and jumped off the back of the boat, with Shane following closely behind me. Sam’s boat was anchored near a cove and I’d been promised wild and wondrous things, so I was eager to explore. It was just us today—me, Shane, Jimmy, and Sam. They’d gone diving ahead of us and if Shane was worried about his dad, he hid it well. He looked happy, like he was loving life, and looking forward to the next adventure.
Breathing through the tubes, masks face-down in the water, we floated along, only moving our feet to propel us forward. My hands were safely tucked against my body to resist the temptation of touching anything. The water in the cove was warmer and so much bluer and clearer than the break where we surfed. You could see straight down to the ocean bottom.
At first, all I saw was plant life and small coral reefs but the further we went, the more sea life we encountered. Schools of fish swam right past us, not bothered by our intrusion, and sea stars floated by. Shane grabbed my hand and pointed to an octopus. I got so excited about the octopus and the stingray I spotted on the ocean’s bottom that I dove down, wanting a closer look. I’d forgotten what Shane had told me about breathing through a snorkel when diving. My lungs compressed, squeezing my chest and suffocating me. I couldn’t breathe. Lightheaded and dizzy, I panicked, and I flailed. I was going to die in the blue waters of a cove off the coast of Laguna Beach.
Arms wrapped around me and Shane pulled me to the surface, my head emerging from the water. He was behind me, or under me, like a life raft. He reached around and removed my mask and snorkel. “You’re okay. I’ve got you. Just breathe, baby.”
I breathed. In. Out. In. Out. Until I calmed down.
“Are you okay?” Shane asked, his voice tinged with concern.
I nodded against his chest and took another fortifying breath. “I’m good. I just got excited about the octopus and then I panicked.”
He held onto me a while longer, floating on his back with his arms wrapped around me. It was still and peaceful, the afternoon sun red under my closed lids and for a while, I was just happy to breathe and hang out like this, the threat of my imminent death well and truly behind me. Snorkeling was fun but after experiencing that pressure on my chest and the feeling of suffocating, I had no interest in learning to deep-sea dive.
“Do you want to go back to the boat?” he asked, his brow furrowed. We were face to face now and he’d taken off his mask and snorkel. There was an imprint on his forehead from the mask and my finger traced it, chasing a bead of water.
“No,” I said quickly. “I want to see everything.”
He smiled, that chilled out beautiful smile I remembered so well. His eyes were green today. Jade green.
My panicky moment a distant memory, I smiled at him. I was smiling so hard my cheekbones ached.
“What’s that smile for?” He pushed a strand of wet hair off my face and tucked it behind my ear, the backs of his fingers brushing my jawline.
“That smile is for you. Thank you for bringing me out here today.”
“Thank you for reminding me how it feels to make you smile.”
“How does it feel?” I asked, my eyes flitting over his face.
“It makes me feel like a god.”
“You’ve always been godlike in my eyes.”
He huffed out a laugh. “Just a mere mortal.” He pushed his hand through his hair and looked over his shoulder at the entrance of the cave then back at me. “I wanted you to see it. I knew you’d love it.”
My eyes lowered to his mouth and he bit his bottom lip. I didn’t think he understood what that did to me, that sexy little move.
“We’re almost at the cave. The tide’s low enough to swim to the other side.”
“Huh?”
He chuckled. “Ready?”
“Yep. Let me just give this a spit and polish.” I spit into my mask which was kind of gross, but supposedly the best way to clear the fog and swished some water in the mask to rinse it before putting it back on my face. Then we were off, exploring the cave and the underwater landscape around the cove with its reef rock spires inhabited by sea snails. We ventured further into open water and spotted sea bass and some sharks, the harmless kind, according to the resident expert on Great Whites. I dove down a few times after that first time and started to get the hang of it, enough so I didn’t panic or feel like I was going to black out at least. For me, the highlight of the snorkeling trip was the dolphins. I loved those things.
By the time we returned to the boat, I was happy and relaxed and chilled out. Jimmy and Sam had already come back and were lounging on the cushioned bench seats in the late afternoon sun, in no hurry to get anywhere. I could understand why Jimmy loved getting out on a boat, diving and snorkeling. There was a whole other world down there. Shane and I chugged bottles of cool, sweet water and then he wrapped an arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer to him on the seat across from Jimmy’s while Sam steered us back to the marina. I captured Jimmy in a dozen photos and tried not to think of a time when I wouldn’t be able to see his smiles in real life.
Jimmy stood up and leaned forward, holding out his hand. Knowing what he wanted, I passed him the camera and leaned into Shane’s side again. I was wearing a turquoise bikini and he was bare-chested in surf shorts. My ocean-damp hair was wild and wavy, whipping around my face in the breeze. We smiled for the camera and Jimmy kept snapping photos. I looked at Shane and he looked at me and we smiled at each other. He lowered his head, his mouth close to the shell of my ear and whispered, “So fucking beautiful” and then he pressed his lips against the sensitive skin just below my ear and I melted.
Best. Day. Ever.
When we docked at the harbor, I wrangled my windblown hair into a topknot and threw on a cotton dress over my bikini. Stepping into my flip-flops, my sea legs carried me to the back of the boat. Shane hopped off the boat onto the dock and held out his hand to me. Even though I didn’t need his assistance, I took his hand and let him help me off the boat. He pulled me against his hard chest and wrapped his arms around me, kissing my lips. A soft, sweet kiss that tasted like the sea and like hope and possibility.
“I’m glad you came back,” he said, his voice low and rough. He kissed the corner of my mouth and my jaw and the side of my neck and I forgot all about how cruel and distant he had been. “My world was so cold and lonely without you too, Firefly.”
“Shane,” I breathed. My heart was so full I thought it might burst.
